


Ocean Breathes Salty

by DarkMignonette



Category: Hellsing, Hellsing Ultimate
Genre: Awe and Angst, Both Cheesy AND Morbid, Canon Divergence, Canon Typical Violence, Dark Comedy, Dream Flashbacks, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Geese shenanigans, Heavy vampire themes, Murky Timeline, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Romance, Sexual Content, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-20
Updated: 2016-08-20
Packaged: 2018-08-10 01:11:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 24,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7824349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkMignonette/pseuds/DarkMignonette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Among the violence, bullets, and undead Pip never thought he would find his perfect girl. Lost among the darkness Seras never imagined love would grasp her hand. PxS. Hints of AxI.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sea

**xxx**

_"Things base and vile, folding no quantity,_  
_Love can transpose to form and dignity:_  
_Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind;_  
_And therefore is wing'd Cupid painted blind:_  
_Nor hath Love's mind of any judgement taste;_  
_Wings and no eyes figure unheedy haste:_  
_And therefore is Love said to be a child,_  
_Because in choice he is so oft beguiled."_  
_(A Midsummer Night's Dream, 1.1)_

**xxx**

The girl was trembling.

She sat rigid in the cheap hotel chair, her head between her knees, eyes shut tight against an invisible threat, as if the danger lurked within the dusty shadows or within her own mind. That creepy fuck Alucard had seeped into the wall to go do who knows what,(probably call his boss), and then the police girl had crashed, she could breathe, but the shakes had started, Pip noticed. Frankly it scared the fuck out of him too when Alucard morphed into darkness, his body blacker than the blackest shadow, as if that were possible, but the mercenary guessed that hadn't been the reason for her unease.

His eyes lingered on her pale, voluptuous thighs beneath her skirt since she wasn't paying him any attention at the moment, but instead of desire he felt sympathy; even her boots were shaking. Sure, he enjoyed getting a rise out of the ex cop, but now he just wanted the pained expression on her face to vanish, for some reason. "'Ey. What's the problem?"

Seras blinked and he caught a glimpse of her eyes, blue as a sunny afternoon sky. She let out a shuddering breath. "Nothing really Captain."

Sounded like a lie to him. "Doesn't look like it."

She shook her head and sat up in her seat, and the trembling increased, as if she were freezing. "I…well, M-master killed…" her voice cracked into a whisper. "He killed those men. So much…blood." She let out another sigh.

So the girl had witnessed the slaughter first hand. Part of him wondered why a vampire(even a fledgling) had issues with carnage, but this was the cute little police girl, so he wasn't really surprised, somehow. But they had been framed by Millennium, and Alucard had only done his job. Some human fools dead, who cares? But Seras had got hung up on it.

Pip crossed the room and sat beside her. He leaned his elbows forward and rested them on his knees. "Deep breaths."

Seras flicked her gaze to his face. "Jus' do it," he said.

Seras drew in a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Before he could stop himself, he laid a hand on her shoulder. "You're a brave girl, you can do better than this," the words seemed derisive but his tone was calm. Merely stated the truth.

She let out another breath. Her hands shook in her lap and she looked down at her hands. "But they were innocent people."

Captain Bernadotte chuckled darkly. "You're in the wrong business chérie."

She peered into his face. He noticed the darker flecks of blue in her brilliant irises. "I know," she mumbled, looking down. "I wanted to save people, not kill them."

Pip recalled suddenly his snot nosed younger self bawling to his grandfather over their mercenary blood; a linage of killers. Life's not fair, he thought to himself, but he couldn't bring himself to admit that to her trusting face. He rubbed her shoulder. "You're new to war."

She shrugged. "They were just following orders, at one point so was I. I don't know…I've always had bad luck." She bit her bottom lip with one fang, an act Pip found sexy and cute at the same time. He wondered how this girl had got herself entangled in this mess, this Neo-Nazi vampire hunting madness. He only knew she had been a hostage at some point and that big scary bastard had turned her into blood drinker.

Pip fished a cigarette from one of his pockets. "Death is everywhere chérie," he talked around his cigarette. "C'est la vie. I make money off it. Might as fucking well. And life goes on." He lit it with the flick of a Zippo. "Aren't you a vampire?"

He could tell his words stewed in her thoughts. Her shaking eased some and she rested back in her chair. Pip had to fight against the urge to stare at the soft white skin beneath the hitch of her skirt. Well he hadn't had a woman in awhile. "I haven't…drank blood from anyone."

Pip exhaled a haze of smoke. "Why the fuck not?"

"I don't want to lose my humanity. But I didn't want to die," she sighed. She glanced away from him and stared off into the dim light of the hotel room. Alucard, Seras and himself had been laying low after the Rio incident, hiding out in a shit urban area hotel. He didn't care. He had his Glock, and his Single Action Army, his favorite. _And two vampires_.

Pip hadn't known the details of her employment with the Hellsing organization, but then he didn't want to hurt her further with unpleasant memories. "Well you wanted to survive. Can't blame you. You get to see another sunrise." Merde, he thought. He meant sundown, he supposed.

"Fuck it's hot," Pip blurted. Godforsaken tropical country. He didn't know what to say to the police girl, for some reason she set him on edge, made him self conscious. It was those big blue eyes, and he felt her gaze on him. He tossed the links of his braid over one shoulder. "Maybe I'll get some beer."

"I'd like to see the ocean," Seras whispered, low enough that Pip almost hadn't caught it.

He regarded her for a moment. He sat forward and leaned close to the blond. "Think the walking nightmare will notice if we're gone?" he whispered.

Her face brightened a little at that, but she held up her hands. "I was just thinking out loud really."

Pip moved his cigarette to the corner of his lip and smiled. "Put your jacket on."

**xxx**

Neon lights glimmered in the dark along with the overhead stars, a million tiny lights above the black vastness of the sea.

Seras studied the view with a grin on her face. She wore her hood pulled over her head, bits of short blond hair poking through the sides. Her movements had gained a cheerful pep as she walked aside the surf, boots in hand, bare feet in the warm water, and Pip was happy to see her previous teary expression gone. He walked beside her, a six pack in hand, cigarette at his lips. A hot breeze brushed by with the salty, fishy scent of the sea and something sweet like tropical roses. "We can't stay out here long chérie, but do you feel better?"

She beamed at him, a bright smile that reached her eyes, and his chest clenched with an emotion he almost didn't recognize, a wave of affection that came on as suddenly as a shot from Eros's arrow. "A little," she admitted, blushing. The moon's pale glow caressed the side of her face, mingling with the colored flare of the city lights and almost made her features ethereal.

Christ, this girl didn't belong amidst weapons and warfare. She was like a beam of sunlight; a naïve maiden lost among a dark thorny forest. He realized this more now. All his life Pip had dealt with killers, smugglers, rotten people, shit people, and he sometimes forget about the good left in the world. Seras wasn't jaded and it surprised him.

Her small form walked beside him amidst the moonlight and sand and the dull roar of the ocean. She looked cute and harmless in her pink jacket and little skirt. Pip had seen some beautiful women in his worldwide war dog career, but with her high cheekbones and doe eyes, Seras reigned supreme on that list. She possessed an almost doll like appearance with a hot temper. _All together one beautiful woman_. Pip thought this over, taking a long drag off his Mint Royale.

He decided right then that nobody would extinguish her spark, as long as he could help it. Nobody would hold a gun to her head. Damn if he wasn't just a human but he was still a good shot.

**xxx**

They had talked for hours, long into the night. Pip told her about all the countries he had seen, mostly desert wastelands or savage humid hellholes at the end of the world. He told her about the rolling hills of the French countryside. Anything to keep her away from the shock of the past few days.

Seras told him about her early years on the force, and only briefly mentioned how her squad had been wiped out by a blood sucker. Pip realized trauma wasn't exactly new to her, not really, poor girl. "You were the only survivor?" He asked as he sprawled out on the stiff hotel bed beside her, Seras perched on the corner, as if getting too close to him would scald her. The air unit sucked in this place and he had peeled off his heavy artillery jacket. He wore only some jeans and a white dirt spattered tank top and he thought he noticed her gaze linger over his tanned muscular arms. Probably wishful thinking. "I didn't really 'survive'", she smiled sadly. "But yes I suppose so."

He frowned. She had no family, orphaned at a young age and she didn't elaborate on how she'd lost her parents and he didn't ask. "I'm sorry," she turned to him, expression almost bashful. "You probably think I'm depressing."

He shrugged his shoulders. "Non, just talking chérie."

Seras looked down at her lap and picked lint off her skirt. A pink flush rested on her cheeks and colored her porcelain skin in a pretty way. Pip broke out a cigarette, hoping the smoke wouldn't bother her but he wasn't sure if her lungs breathed in air or not anyway.

He caught a whiff of his underarms and scowled, ready to trade in Brazil's humid air for the cool mists of England. A devious thought crossed his mind. "I need a shower, care to join me ey Seras?" He wiggled his eyebrows, only half joking. He imagined the supple skin of her huge breasts, shiny and speckled with water droplets, pressed together against his chest. _Damn_.

She stared at him and her whole face colored a deep red. "W-what?"

He grinned around his cigarette. "You 'an me oui?"

She looked like she didn't know what to do with her face. "Pervert!"

He laughed at her frazzled expression. He had hoped…but wasn't surprised, and he hid his disappointment. "Ah well." He rose from the bed, sheets sticking to his shoulders and he tossed them off the bed. He crushed his cigarette in a nearby ash tray and headed for the shower. "Be right back."

When he returned twenty minutes later(he hadn't bothered with his hair, it took a long time to let loose the plaits and thread his fingers through all of it) Seras was curled onto her side in the center of the bed, long eyelashes like lace across her cheeks.

Pip hovered beside the bed, clad only in his boxers. Well it was all he had with him at the time, and he partially hoped his tall, toned physique would tempt the innocent Seras. He studied her resting angelic face. Still hard to believe this was a vampire, a predatory creature, but Pip felt more like a ruthless killer than this little girl; he had blown some men's brains out with his Glock 17 not twenty hours ago, and Seras had cried over a few dead policeman.

He let out a sigh, wringing out his braid with a towel. He could lift her and carry her to her coffin next door, but he almost didn't have the heart to do it. Plus he didn't want to barge in on Alucard. But would 'ol tall dark and creepy be pissed that Pip had kept his fledgling? He didn't know. A shudder danced down his spine.

He leaned over the bed, braid dangling across one shoulder as he moved to pick her up, and her eyes opened halfway. "No," she mumbled. "No…my nightmares…" She buried her face in the pillow and fell out again, chest rising and falling softly. The corner of her lips shined with a hint of drool.

Pip straightened back up, rubbing his head. Looks like he would be sharing a bed with a woman he hadn't fucked, as strange as that felt. But it was alright.

He fell into the bed, his corner of the bed anyway, and after two days of fighting and madness he drifted off to sleep, the echoes of gunfire ringing in his head, and blue eyes haunted his dreams.

**xxx**

Sirens wailed like ghosts and jerked Pip out of his slumber. The hotel room settled under a blanket of darkness, a crescent moon visible through one dingy window, and the mercenary wondered how long he had slept. The sirens had put him on edge but he realized it was just city noise like dogs barking and the dull roar of traffic. He shook his head, a headache forming behind his good eye.

He felt rather than saw the small form nestled in his arms. The gentle curves of a woman, and he caught the scent of something soft like wild roses and jasmine. She slept curled against his broad chest, his arms wrapped around her torso, hands resting across her back. She had mentioned nightmares but her face was slack with an easy slumber.

He glanced over her shoulder at the glowing red numbers by the bed. 12:04 p.m. His thoughts muddled together and he tried to remember his current location, (what country? what city?) and the location of his guns. Cans of beer covered the bedside table and the aluminum shined in the dull light like fool's gold.

He didn't know how they had ended tangled up together like this. He glanced down his nose at the swell of her breasts, pressed between her arms and pushed against his chest, and he studied the line of her cleavage, the top buttons of her uniform had popped open at some point during the night. Her tits felt soft and pliant. Not fake, like he had guessed the second Integra Hellsing had introduced the girl. Natural double D's, yet as perky as a slutty college girl's B cups. _Christ_. Pip swallowed a lump in his throat. She lay on her side and her waist dipped down before her round hips tightened the material of her skirt. Pip knew he needed to move before his interest in her made itself known against her stomach. And he needed a cigarette.

It almost pained him to untangle himself from her body. As he lifted his arms from around her sides, her eyes opened within an inch from his face, hazy and confused. He froze. "Good morning ma petite," he whispered.

Seras jerked backwards and he grabbed her waist before she fell onto the floor. She gripped his shoulders, eyes wide beneath her yellow bangs. She blushed hotly. "C-captain, what…"

Her gaze wandered from his face, down his bare chest and quickly back up again. She scrambled from the bed and he let her go, grinning despite himself. She almost tripped over her own feet getting away from him. "Don't worry," he teased. "You only fell asleep in my arms, that's all."

"W-w-why aren't you dressed?!"

Pip flicked on the light and searched for his lighter among the trash of the bedside table. "You're lucky, I usually sleep in the nude."

She covered her face with her hands, hiding her blush, and it was such an innocent gesture Pip laughed again. Under normal circumstances he would have been insulted, he had no problem with women, but he knew by now that Seras wasn't like most women. "You act like you've never seen a man before, chérie."

Seras let out an exasperated groan. She held the bridge of her nose between her fingertips.

Pip sighed as the familiar taste of mint and tobacco filled his lungs then emptied into the stale room. First cigarette of many for the day. He hoped they would leave this dirty city so he could buy his brand back in London. "Any bad dreams?"

The skin over her blond eyebrows wrinkled. "Actually…no." She shrugged, and a small smile graced her lips, her cheeks still tinted pink. "Thanks." Another burst of endearment flooded his chest, and his stomach flipped, like honest to goddamn teenaged butterflies. What the fuck was wrong with him?

The Captain smiled at her. "I'm glad."

Her eyes brightened. "Me too."

**xxx**

"Have fun with my servant?"

Pip warily eyed the vampire across from him. During the night some crazy Iscariot fuck had given them a free Vatican issued plane, for reasons Pip didn't really understand, and they were finally in the sky on their way back to London. The stars flickered above black clouds with an endless cold light, stoic witnesses to the earth's endless suffering. The vampire grinned, pleased with the return trip all thanks to the sun's absence, Pip supposed.

Pip gripped his seat. He felt sweat trickle down the back of his neck. He almost wished that he could ride below in the cargo with Seras. Hell even in a coffin. Anywhere but alone with the red cloaked, gun wielding maniacal No Life King. Murder in heinous ways was a mere whimsy to this bastard, and the Captain knew it. Death seeped from the vampire in waves and Pip felt the revulsion down into his pores.

Pip cleared his throat, tongue suddenly gone dry. His balls drew up to his crotch. He hated to be such a pussy, but Alucard took first place to Scariest Motherfuckers Ever, and Pip had known some bad ass cut throat killers in his career. Well Alucard was the _baddest_. "Come again?"

That unnerving grin remained, and Pip couldn't see his eyes behind those round rimmed glasses but he felt his crushing gaze, as if a whole army was staring him down on a red soaked battlefield. "You heard me Frenchman."

Pip shrugged and averted his eyes, trying to stay casual though his hands trembled. "Seras is a good girl." He didn't know what else to fucking say.

"A new French toy for the Police Girl," he cackled in his dark voice. Pip stuck a trembling hand in his pocket, fishing for his lighter, though he kept his eyes trained on Alucard. "She's a nightwalker, and believe me Captain, you think you are playing with her but she'll eat you whole."

**xxx**

**xx**

**x**

* * *


	2. Haunted

"Age cannot wither her, nor custom stale  
Her infinite variety. Other women cloy  
The appetites they feed, but she makes hungry  
Where most she satisfies. . . ."

**xxx**

**xx**

**x**

"Fuck! Incoming!"

The roar of gunfire sliced through the air. Dirt exploded in a violent spray around the foxhole and the whine from a heavy artillery shell blasted the ground and Pip dove down into sweet damp earth and covered his head, clutching his rifle to his side. He hoped fucking reinforcements would show their asses before the rebels blasted the Wild Geese into oblivion. The thick tropical heat clogged his lungs along with the acrid stench of smoke. Blood trickled down the side of his face.

"Merde!" He reloaded his AK-74 and fired with one hand over the packed earth. "Motherfuckers!" His aim had been accurate and a bullet caught an enemy shoulder in the face. A pained, confused expression crossed the man's face, flickers of dying thoughts behind his dark eyes. Blood and grey matter sprayed the enemy barricade wall in violent shower of flesh and bone, before the rebels retaliated with a flurry of gunfire. Wails pierced the air from both sides; a grenade blew off the arm of a retreating Goose soldier and across the field a man let out a stream of curses in his native tongue. The rebels screamed war cries like dying savages and Pip fired his remaining shells into the brush. Torn innards squelched and men cried out to their impassive foreign God as blood splashed the green fans of tropic ferns.

Rick, his lieutenant heaved himself around the corner, firing shots at the enemy with blasts from his Norinco rifle as he crouched beside his Captain. "We're getting fucked aren't we?"

Liquid seeped into his one good eye turning his field of vision a soupy red. Pip reloaded his weapon. "We're not going to die today." Fuck he hated Uganda. So much brush and thick humidity and stubborn enemies. Pip fired. A rebel died with his mouth wide open and blood and vomit spewed from his lips, before he crashed face down on the grassy earth, gun still clutched in hand. Another barrage of gunfire split his head open like a melon as the bullets jerked and twitched his body and reduced him to mush. Good riddance, Pip thought. These bastards had kept the Geese cornered in a pocket of rainforest for twelve hours. Fuck he wanted a cigarette.

"Captain!"

Pip aimed the nose of his rifle at the top of the foxhole, about to put some fuckers down for the long sleep. He didn't want to yell over the roar of gunfire. "Goddammit what?!"

Clouds crossed over the sky and the sun died behind a dark haze. The African heatwave cooled several degrees and a breeze carried the sweet and revolting stench of rot and gunpowder. Chills pricked the back of his neck and his arms broke out in gooseflesh. What the fuck? Even behind his rifle fear snagged his heart and filled it with ice, a wave of cold terror that froze even his bones.

The gunfire morphed into heavier fire, the rat-tat-tat of submachine guns, as if the rebels had traded their cheap AK-47's for MP40s; WWII era army issued weapons.

Kill. Kill. Kill. KILL. KILL. K I L L

The mantra echoed within his brain, yet real enough and loud enough that his Rick heard it too and Pip and the other soldier stared at each other in confusion and fear. The voice had been forced inside his thoughts, as if his mind had been invaded and raped. His lieutenant's eyes were wide as he clutched his rifle to his chest, like a child with a favorite doll. "W-what…you hear that?"

More of the Wild Geese paused and glanced around them, some poking their heads from behind trees and fauna, guns shivering in their hands. "Captain what the fuck is that?"

"Get down!" He barked. "Idiots!"

A barrage of fire whistled through the air and laughter creeped across the no man's land in between. Pip surveyed the field. His heart dropped into his stomach and it felt like he was falling, even though his limbs held him paralyzed in place. The bodies of the dead laying forgotten in the tall grass shambled to their feet, eyes hazy, mouths open in empty expressions of hunger. One of the dead rebels stumbled towards the mercenaries, movements rigid and mechanical like a broken wind up toy; it lumbered forward without its head, a twisted stump of a neck over its shoulders, a crimson cascade of blood down its chest. The rebel Pip had gunned down moaned in rage and agony as it tried to rise up on its forearms, but the rest of its torso had been reduced to a jumble of torn flesh and it only screamed an animal sound in the bloody thicket.

The living rebels had switched their brown desert camo for grey and silver uniforms. Pip saw the reflective flash of army medallions. The enemy's eyes shimmered red in the grey, hazy light, hundreds and hundreds of floating crimson eyes. There had only been a squadron of rebels, not a whole fucking army. Laughter floated across the field and bored into Pip's brain and the hollow voices echoed and knocked around his skull like the bullet of a .22 bouncing through a body and tearing flesh. He clutched his aching head. ' _Mon Dieu_ …'

At the sight of the walking corpses the Wild Geese lost their shit. They screamed in terror and mowed down the animated dead, heads exploded but the legs still moved, bodies danced under the bite of the bullets but the laughter continued, almost as loud as the screaming weapons. His lieutenant bellowed a stream of curses beside him. "Fuck! Fuck! What the fuck?!"

Pip felt his command over the Geese spiral out of control. A terrified unit was a dead unit, but Pip didn't know what to tell them. "Keep firing!" He shouted. He emptied a round into an eyeless, armless corpse. The tone of his men's screams quickly turned into almost feminine squeals as the dead and living enemy closed in on them.

As more of the rebels shambled out from the brush Pip realized something had turned horribly wrong. The enemy wore World War II era grey uniforms, just like the old black and white photos his grandfather had showed him from his fighting days in Germany. Swastikas glimmered like bent stars on their hats and shoulders. Nazis. They were fighting goddamn fucking krauts.

They tramped across the field with lightning speed, guns in hand, unaffected by the whizz of the mercenary bullets around their heads, almost joyous in their unnatural flight across the no man's land. As with the ghouls, the Geese's bullets hit home but the fuckers still moved, laughing, unharmed, bloody and menacing in their dark uniforms.

One of the Geese screamed in horror as a man propelled himself over his rifle and dove at his chest, tearing his throat open in one fell swoop. Blood burst from his jugular like water in a torn hose. No, not a man at all.

Everywhere his men screeched, a chorus of horror as the new enemy ate them alive, swarmed them and bit chunks from arms and faces and throats. Pip himself finally screamed as terror crushed him. "Fuck you!" Red eyes, red blood, red fear. He wiped the blood from one eye. Monsters, fucking monsters!

A Nazi charged him and Pip saw a flash of jagged, shark like teeth in the man's gaping maw before pain fired through his body and his vision turned black.

**xxx**

Pip bolted upright in bed, breathing heavy, sheets pooling around his waist. Only a dim room greeted him. A wisp of afternoon light shone from one dusty covered window. His heart hammered like a trapped animal in his chest and he clutched his throat, running a hand across his bare torso, half expecting blood. Jesus. He had some nasty nightmares sometimes but not normally on that level, and never with vampires. He guessed seeing that colonel torn apart by a group of Millennium freaks on that screen, back in London, really fucked with his subconscious. He recalled the wet noises of their mouths eating the bastard alive like a pack of rabid wolves, remembered the screams of agony and that little Hitler youth boy's cackling laughter. He shivered, a chill that ran all the way down his back and legs.

Someone snored next to him. The mercenary studied the little figure of the sleeping draculina; she wore her blue cotton night clothes(Pip had asked for her to sleep in negligee but that idea had been quickly shot down by a blushing, irritated Seras). She slept on her side facing him, hands curled beneath her chin. A calm settled over Pip's racing heart. She had started sharing a bed with him some days, when her strength had increased enough to where her own coffin wasn't needed, and when she 'got sick of her nightmares.' He never groped her in bed, and so she must have trusted him. When her face twisted in pain during her slumber, Pip would wrap his arms around her waist and hold her until her breathing evened out and her face rested in peace. He swiped stray strands of platinum blond hair from her forehead. God, she was beautiful.

Too beautiful to be sharing a bed with a dog like him.

Her soft presence quieted his own demons, so it was a mutually beneficial relationship. Merde, how he wanted sex to be involved; a carnal dance with his mignonette, he felt that need down in the very veins of his cock, but he had to keep his hands to himself, at least in the bedroom, lest he chase her off, and damn, he needed her gentle contact more and more these days.

Especially when his reality had been suddenly turned into a real life horror show. He only hoped that dream hadn't been some kind of ill omen.

"Captain…" she muttered, rubbing her eyes. Those big baby blues opened and regarded him sleepily. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing ma chère," he fingered the tips of her hair. "Go back to sleep."

She closed her eyes and smiled, and he fought the urge to tug her into his arms and bury his face in her sweet smelling hair. He leaned down and let himself plant a soft kiss on her cheek and she blushed but didn't flinch or pull away. Pip grinned and whispered into her ear, "Tes yeux, j'en rêve jour et nuit. Tu es l'amour de ma vie Mignonette." She smiled dreamily, the words sounded like sweet nonsense to her, and she drifted back into slumber.

**xxx**

Darkness held the practice field in a dim shroud. The last light had drifted beneath the indigo sky and the forest around the mansion transformed into the shape of one solid black silhouette. The targets hovered several meters across the open meadow, at the edge of the wood like dim ghosts.

Pip fired his Colt revolver and the shot rang out in the still air, scaring a flock of birds that went screeching into the night(or bats, who knew?). The bullet hit the cardboard terrorist straight in the head.

"Nice one Captain!" Seras nodded, standing off to the left beside him. A few of the Geese hovered around the firing range, looking sleepy. They hadn't quite adjusted to their nocturnal schedule and spent most of their daylight time drinking and whoring, instead of in bed during the afternoon like their Captain. Pip felt like a vampire himself most days.

He grinned and offered Seras the butt of the gun. "It's an antique, want to try?"

Her face lit up and she nodded. "Sure!"

She looked adorable to him, an English doll with an old gun. She held the weapon naturally, and it actually looked right in her hands, unlike the oversized breech loader canon she typically shot and which blew Pip's mind. She held the gun at eye level and fired.

The shot blasted off the head of the second fake terrorist, no surprise considering her vampiric super vision. "Ah ma petite good job!" He slapped a hand over her shoulder.

Mirth twinkled in her eyes but she shook her head. "'Name's Seras, Captain." She studied the pistol for a moment before handing it back to him. "That's a neat gun."

He slid the Colt back in the holster at his hip. "Pip Bernadotte's my name, miss Victoria."

She lightly shoved him but her 'light shove' almost knocked him off his feet and he stumbled sideways before he caught himself. "Watch it!" He laughed. "Bully!"

She held up her hands and smiled, one fang poking into her bottom lip. "Sorry."

After an hour or so of field practice, a handful of bored mercenaries hovered around the pair and watched Seras fire her formidable anti-midian rifle in a series of blasts. 13.7mm rounds. After months of training together, the sweet disposition of the little vampire had eased the Geese's fear of her and they gawked at her power, some staring lower at the seductive swell of her ass. Pip himself couldn't blame them, but he still squared his shoulders and fought back a pinch of irritation.

"Damn girly!"

"Headshots!"

"Amazing!"

The Captain knew his men were as amused over Seras's strength as he was. She spun on her heel and grinned with a thumbs up.

Later, on the trek back to the mansion the Captain heard Joe, one of his least favorite soldiers(Joe was reliable in the field but possessed a big mouth and lacked a few crayons in his box), say some perverse drivel about the Police Girl. "What a woman eh Tom?" He muttered the statement but then he laughed, a harsh sound like a braying ass. "Those tits! Got the body of a whore if I ever saw one."

The muscles in Pip's jaw muscles clenched. ' _Alright fucker, shut up_.' Seras trekked a few feet behind them toting her weapon and he didn't know how much she picked up with her advanced hearing and the idiot was being none too quiet.

Bill and Tom laughed uneasily. Tom snuck furtive glances toward his Captain and Bill shook his head at his friend, eyes uneasy. Pip didn't know if they felt nervous because the vampire could hear him or due to the deadly quiet expression on their Captain's face.

"Too bad she's a dumb vampire slut!"

Pip shouldered his way through the cluster of mercenaries and Joe's eyes widened as the merc grabbed fistfuls of the shorter man's collar. He jerked him off his feet. "Shut the fuck up! Or me 'an you are gonna have it out right here on the lawn ass'ole!"

The Geese tripped over each other to get out of the way, then some continued on their way to the mansion. Still a handful circled the two, some laughing, some stern faced, as the older men shook their head at Joe's insulting nonsense, Seras had been nothing but kind to a flock bottomfeeding killers. Besides the girl had been staying in the Captain's room and Joe should have known to keep his mouth shut.

Joe winced, surprised. He grabbed the fist holding him off his toes. "Alright Captain fuck! Just a woman!"

Seras caught up with them. The Geese stepped aside.

Pip dropped the man. Joe stepped fell back, eyes wary. "Shut up," the merc said. He didn't want Seras to hear that bullshit. The men hit on her sure but she wasn't stupid, he recognized the keen intelligence being her eyes, and she didn't deserve for her vampirism to be used against her either. Joe didn't know the half of it. She already didn't trust men as it was.

The Captain strode off, and the other men kept a distance behind him, Seras trailing behind, a perplexed expression across her face.

**xxx**

Water trickled down his chest and back as he splashed his face in the shower, the outdated tile as white as a sterile hospital room, the isolated bathroom silent aside from the rhythm of the shower. Pip shivered. The water felt unpleasant, ice on his skin, but the Hellsing mansion itself gave him the creeps. Bad shit had happened in this burgois place, a heavy feeling seeped from the old walls as if each brick had come from desecrated ground. Or it could just be Alucard. That bastard haunting this place was tremendously worse than any ghost.

His wet braid dangled across his back. He rubbed his eyes, free of his eyepatch, and he prodded the left empty lid. Five years since he had lost half his sight. Fuck, he felt like he was getting old; not two hours ago he couldn't even keep it up for that whore, some cockney prostitute with honey blond hair and large breasts, but he had felt only numb and deflated in her hands. Her brown eyes had been dim. Beautiful, nice, with sad voice and a burnt out flame, like so many other working girls and Pip couldn't even bring himself to care.

The doll face of the Police Girl had haunted his mind. He had wanted to picture that sweet smile on the woman's wrinkled mouth. He wanted her to blush at his advances, his foul words, but the poor whore was nothing like the draculina. It had been a farce. He had paid her and turned her away.

Now his skin ached for the touch of a woman, but he wanted her to drag petite hands up his legs, dig her nails into his thighs, feel the sting of a bite from that sweet cupid's bow mouth, the girl so much like a Botticelli angel from hell. He wanted to hold her trusting face in his hands and teach her that not every man's touch had to be a crushing blow that knocked her off her feet, as so often life had dealt her a bad card. She deserved to know tenderness.

He hoped the cold shower would ease his suffering, but fuck he had a bigger problem than his sex drive, he realized with a start. He was falling dangerously in love with Seras Victoria.

**xxx**

**xx**

**x**

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Yeah I don't know that much about guns and warfare lol I like war movies but...so I doubt the mercenary scene is very good but I tried. Thank God for the movie and comics internet database of weapons lol. Feel free to correct me on anything. Also I don't have a beta but I tried to catch any mistakes. And I get self indulgent talking about Pip and describing Pip too much probably lol. I love that man. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! Write those fics! Please! XD
> 
> *Tu es l'amour de ma vie = You're the love of my life.
> 
> *Tes yeux, j'en rêve jour et nuit = I dream about your eyes day and night.
> 
> 1st edit.


	3. Instinct

A persistent call rattled around in the corners of her mind, echoed in the flesh under her skull, tugged at her heavy eyelids. She knew, despite how  her body lay safe and buried beneath stone, away from the sun, she knew that the last sliver of light had faded away, replaced by blue black darkness. The crone's shaded mantle had dropped down over her corner of the world. Seras eased into consciousness and already she missed the blank nothing of a dreamless sleep. Rise, the voice called. 

Her eyes met shadow. Obscure forms of blackness unfurled and trembled against the wall like hellish flowers in the wind. Various layers of darkness, some ink black, other grey, curled around the stone room like so many petals on a black roses. Moving, like snakes with long human hands feeling for the ceiling. 

Seras frowned. She had to look at the vivid shadows every time she opened her eyes. Any dark forest, every dimly lit pub and street, the swirling sea of black trailed after her presence, licked after her boots. Not sentient, not ghosts, just her unholy vision and it's ability to notice the thousands of tiny gradients in darkness. She didn't know for sure if the shapes were even real, or a figment of the dark gift warping her mind. 

These days she didn't pay it much attention. She blinked. Not a speck of light in her room but she could watch the shapes swirl across the floor. If she killed for blood, what else could her vampiric vision discover? She was afraid to find out. 

She lay staring at the ceiling, watching the dark dance. She swallowed and old saliva stung her throat, her mouth bone dry and tasteless. It had been about a year since her tongue had touched solid food. She couldn't remember what a cheese toastie tasted like. Even worse, the thought of human food lurched her stomach. 

A soft snore drew her attention to her right. A warm body lay sprawled out on his back beside her, one hand on his chest and the other flung behind his head, brown hair woven in a loose braid beside his neck. His solid weight pressed into the mattress. 

The aroma of a living person teased her nose along with the spicy masculine scent of her Captain. His breathing filled the dull quiet of the room like white noise. 

She turned on her side. Her heart swelled with warmth, bright and pleasant like a summers day as she studied him in his sleep. She could never gaze at him outright unless he goaded her into arguing with him, which he did at every opportunity for whatever reason. She had made the mistake once of letting herself stare at his handsome face him too long, without realizing she was doing it, and he had caught her. He had grinned and said some flirtatious and cocky nonsense and she learned to keep her wandering eyes in check from then on.

But in slumber, she allowed herself the pleasure of gazing at his square jawline, his long eyelashes and generous mouth; for all his foul jokes and perverted language, in sleep he resembled an angel, maybe a beautiful warrior of heaven like Micheal. She'd never tell him that though, never ever. 

She blushed as if he could hear her thoughts in the shallow darkness. He's an idiot, what was she thinking.

Even as a strange sort of affection for the mercenary burrowed into her heart, his mere presence enticed her, called her to him as a flower turns its petals towards the dawn. She chewed on the corner of her lip. Why did see share a bed with this man day after day? And unspoken agreement said that they kept each other's nightmares at bay, cuddled beneath the sheets like two frightened children. But as she rose to blackness every night on cue like some sort of nocturnal freak show, the steady presence of Pip Bernadotte soothed her thoughts. She never used a night light until now.

She wanted more and more every day to wake up folded between his arms, shielded from the world by the wall of his wide shoulders. Never before has she yearned for a single man's touch, for the scent of his cologne and it's associated memories or the timbre of his laugh. 

He slept in boxers('basically shorts' he has finally been able to convince her) and a dingy white tank top, his muscular shoulders tan, bare, and scarred. The fabric of his shirt stretched across his broad chest and abdomen, doing nothing to hide his strong physique. A shiver danced down her spine and she touched tentative fingers to her cheek, blushing. See? That's why she didn't look at him much. 

She caught the faint whiff of something sharp and sweet and she snapped her gaze towards the hand on his chest. The smell activated the production of saliva in her mouth and the tip of her tongue grazed her lips. By her body's response alone she knew that smell. 

A red gash marred the top of his hand, across the tendons. He must have aggravated the cut somehow in his sleep and blood pooled at the surface of the cut with a thin line trailing towards his knuckles. The maroon liquid glimmered under her gaze, the blood thick like juice squeezed from an exotic fruit. The forbidden apple, luscious and fat. Her stomach knotted and hunger clawed at all corners of her body. The blood had pumped through her Captain's veins, surged through the chambers of his pulsing heart before it had been squeezed from his skin like an offering of wine. And she was thirsty. So thirsty. 

She sat up beside him in a single slow movement. He snored and mumbled something in French. Seras cupped his injured hand in her own and brought it to her mouth, her lips dragging across the surface of his knuckles. The coppery scent of blood filled her nose. One kiss of her fangs and she would bathe her tongue in his fluid. As the wolf tears open the throat of a deer, she could drown in the taste of his blood. No. This man wasn't prey raised for slaughter. Stop. But the blood- the blood- 

Stop..

Body rigid, eyes locked on his slumbering face, she dabbed the tip of her tongue in the cut. Pleasure swamped her brain and raced down her spine as the metallic taste numbed her mouth with little bursts of euphoria, like she had never known true satisfaction, never known true intoxication, no beer or liquor came close to the sickly sweet taste and power of this crimson wine. She shivered again and closed her eyes, gently sucking on the wound, a thin sheen of saliva slick on her chin. 

"Girl.."

A groggy voice snapped her from her task and she met his gaze, his one green eye confused and hazy, jaw still slack from sleep. He furrowed his brows but didn't pull or jerk his hand away. "What're you-"

She stared straight into his face as she resumed cleaning the cut, and she watched as his confusion morphed into a heavy, but calm emotion. This human wasn't a threat. 

Without breaking eye contact, she swung one leg over his waist and plopped down on his lap, one knee on either side of his hips. A quiet moan escaped his lips and he immediately pressed fingers into her lower back with his free hand; his touch heated her skin like a hot pad. She stared into his gaze, rolling in the desire she found there, as dark and hot as her hunger. 

Blood trickled down his knuckles onto his fingers. She turned his hand and swirled her tongue around his index and middle fingers, letting the red soak into her mouth, her gaze locked with his, eyelids heavy. The Captain stared back from the shadows with enough heat to light the fire within her body, a surge of excitement straight down between her thighs. 

Even as she sat atop him on the bed, she kept him frozen in place with her stare, and a soft moan burst from him when she stuck both his fingers far past her lips; fingertips touching the edge of her throat. 

His eyebrows shot up into his bangs and he cursed in French. 

A salty taste lingered on his hands and mingled with the blood, lighter than the fluid in his veins, but almost as seductive. She licked it from his skin without a second thought. He lay rigid beneath her like a stone, but she smelled no fear.

He tightened his grip on her lower back, the cotton of her night shirt folded in his grip. The sound of his labored breathing pierced the darkness. She sucked his skin bone dry. 

A different sort of hunger clouded her brain as she cleaned his hand, a pulse throbbed in her lower body with an ache different than the bloodlust, a craving strong and primal and frustrating; she didn't understand what it wanted, but somehow she knew this man could satisfy it. His boxers had been soft, but beneath the fabric a rigid heat touched the junction of her thighs.

Her body and the vampire within herself screamed for some sort of release. Without thinking, she ground herself hard into his groin. 

Pleasure shot up her spine. A moan flew from her lips, echoed by the Captain's deep male groan, his fingers pressed down against her tongue into her teeth, her chin damp with saliva and blood.

The alien sound of a needy cry from her own voice broke the spell. She came to her senses. Eyes wide, she realized her predicament; sprawled across her bare chested Captain's lap, sucking on his fingers, breathing heavy and grinding into his-

With a small shriek she jerked his hand away, ignoring the dribble of spit and launched herself off of him, off the bed, stumbling into the darkness.

She didn't wait for his response. She heard him maybe call out to her with one of his pet names but she had already burst from the room and stumbled down the hall, undead heart beating like a caged animal even though it normally never beat at all.

 

**xxx**

 

"Seras, you're late."

Integra regarded the draculina as she hurried to a seat at Hellsing's massive round table. She felt her boss's heavy, yet not unkind gaze on her as soon as she tiptoed into the room. Integra sat at the head of the table, with Walter at her side as per usual, Alucard a few chairs down, and a certain mercenary four seats away from the tall vampire.  A crescent moon peaked through the window behind Integra's shoulders. 

Seras almost tripped over her own feet before finding a vacant chair close to Walter. "Sorry Sir, em, slept in too late." She peered down at her hands, flushing at her lame excuse and hoping her Master wasn't inclined to read her mind today. She didn't dare look in Pip's general direction.

Integra sighed and ashed her cigar in a crystal ashtray. "Just don't do it again. These are dire times." She frowned. "What's the matter?"

Seras snapped her head up and stared, wide eyed. "Nothing! Um nothing, why?"

"Your face is red."

She iron will forced herself not to look down the table at her Captain. She half expected a laugh or some sort of leud comment but Bernadotte sat quiet as a mouse; as if nothing happened and they both had woken up in their own separate beds.

She smiled through her embarrassment. "I-I just rushed to get here s'all." 

Her Master seemed to grin at her from across the table. He leaned in his chair, a goblet of blood in front of him. But then again, he always smiled in a half malicious, half amused manner and he had just risen from the cold dark of the dungeons; eager for either Integra's orders or her voice alone. Seras didn't know. How could one ever tell with him? 

Integra seemed satisfied enough with her answer and let it go. She shifted her attention back towards the subject of the meeting. "Let me begin." Her voice echoed in the spacious room, clear and strong. "We Hellsing have a duty to the crown, to our Lord and to every child in our sovereign land to eradicate Millennium. They are coming to eradicate our humanity. They are lunatics, and they are monsters. This evening we need to reinstate our plan of attack, our plan of defense, and all our choices. If cornered, we must turn on our backs and strike, just as the mongoose bites off the head of the cobra. Captain Bernadotte, it is of upmost importance that you train your men for this supernatural threat as best you can. If not, they will make mincemeat out of you. I swear on my father's grave that you're at a disadvantage. 

At Integra's words and unable to stop herself, Seras swallowed her pride and drifted her gaze towards the mercenary. Though he slouched in the wide backed chair, he regarded Integra with stern features, not fearful or angry, but what Seras learned to regard as his combat facade. This seemed to her more than his usual principle of earning your pay or any other mercenary malarkey. He wore the face of a military leader with lives on his shoulders. "I understand," he stated simply. 

Seras noticed the tension in his jaw, and how he had yet to light a cigarette. He had thrown his familiar jacket over the same white tank top she had felt beneath her hands not an hour before. It almost surprised her how handsome he looked with a pensive, almost brooding expression, when she had become accustomed to his playful banter; both aspects of him gave her a crazy case of butterflies. The bastard looked good no matter what. It was almost irritating. 

Seras didn't realize her thoughts had drifted off. Integra had continued on to discuss the possibility of land mines on the property, but Seras had her mind and eyes stuck on Captain Bernadotte. 

He must have felt her eyes on him because one green eye turned from Integra and met her gaze. 

Seras's face burned crimson. She turned her head away. She was outright staring at him in a bloody important meeting with everybody in the room. Damn!

She really needed to listen. She reminded herself. She honestly had no idea what to expect from this madness. She had been trained in law enforcement, not warfare. She had wanted to help and protect people. So she had a hard time with what explosives worked best for this environment or that environment; or which ones could blow the most people to pieces.

She frowned. At the end of the day she didn't want anyone attacking the Wild Geese, though bullets were the name of their game. She liked the men. She didn't want any freaks ripping their faces off. At that thought, anxiety sank like a weight in her stomach. Doubtful that would ever happen, right? The enemy would have to go through her Master, Walter, and then finally herself. With Alucard and Walter alone, the Nazi's had plenty stacked against them before they would even get to the Wild Geese. 

But Sir Integra apparently thought it could happen. Seras bit her lip. 

Seras was a vampire straight from the source. She wouldn't let it happen. 

 

**xxx**

 

She felt his presence before his boots left the pavement and crushed the grass underfoot on Hellsing's perfectly manicured lawn. Seras sat on a bench by herself at the farthest end of the grounds, where flowerbeds turned wild and oak and fir lined the unused corner of the property. Stars illuminated the indigo sky above and a few lanterns hovered by the main path. An owl screeched in the distance.

Pip didn't bother with any greeting as he approached the bench, the cherry of his cigarette dancing bright in the darkness like a lone firefly. He must have known by now that catching her off guard on accident wasn't likely. Even sunk deep in her thoughts, she heard his breath as he exhaled a haze of smoke. 

Seras peered off into the woods, as if admiring the scenery. She tried to nonchalantly wipe her sweaty hands on her skirt, cursing herself for forgetting the gloves that went with her uniform. She didn't understand why her Captain's company made her so antsy. 

Without a word he plopped down next to her and swung one hand over the back of the bench. Seras fought the urge to scoot away from him. With his height and wide shoulders, Pip was a fairly big guy and he invaded her space on the little seat whether he meant to or not. 

Seras shifted in her spot. A day had past since the incident in his room and she had retired to her own coffin deep in the bowls of the mansion when the sun rose. She didn't know what to say, or how to talk to him about her outrageous behavior that night so she had walked the long way down to her room in an attempt to avoid him until she gathered her thoughts. Guilt nagged at her. She felt like a coward. 

But staring at the dull ceiling of her coffin, with the cold dark swirling around her and the damp stink of soil in her nose hadn't been a pleasant choice either. But she had to sleep in her own room every so often anyway; how would Walter react if he came to fetch her one day and found her coffin vacant? Integra wouldn't be pleased to say the least. Would they really believe that her shacking up in the Captain's room was wholly innocent? 

She blushed. Truthfully was she kidding herself? It didn't feel innocent.

"Bonsoir. Peaceful out here, you think?"

His smooth voice brought her back to the present. She glanced at him before looking back down at her shoes. "It is."

She felt stupid. She didn't know what to say. She had never been exactly great at small talk. She thought briefly of all the times in school when she had been teased for being shy, for acting like a wallflower nobody could crack open. 

Pip didn't seem phased. He let out a big sigh. "You know, I don't know what to think of this Nazi business. I've never fought krauts. I feel like my grandfather. Wish the ol' bastard was still around."

"You miss him?"

Pip shrugged. "Not really. I wish I could ask him what's the best way to kill these boches."

Seras blinked. She didn't know why but she cracked a smile. 

"He had a high kill count. He spent years in the French Resistance and then continued on the family business after the war." He took a long drag off his cigarette before continuing. "Practically raised me though. Mean old man. Paix à son âme."

Seras studied him as he gazed off in the distance, half his face cast in shadow by the dim streetlight and the glow of the moon. He left his hat behind and his braided hair hung over one shoulder in all its glory. 

Seras smiled in a grim line. "I don't know if your grandfather ever faced these kinds of men though Captain," she whispered. 

He scoffed. "And that's another thing. I thought I had seen every kind of monster known to man. Human cruelty and it's nastiness. Well turns out there's more out there, some legendary fairy tail type bullshit. Monsters you can't put down with a run of the mill bullet. Vampires are real!" He threw up one hand. "What fucking world are we living in?"

"Try being one."

Seras winced. That had sounded harsher than she meant it. "Well.." she mumbled. "I'm...you know."

Pip regarded her with his one eye, and his expression softened. "You're not a monster mignonette."

She wrung her hands in her lap. "I feel like I am."

Pip leaned forward pulled a pack of Lucky Strikes from his pocket. He ashed his cigarette in the empty packet. "Ma chère, how many humans have you killed?"

She sent him a wry look. "I do hope you know my actual name is Seras."

He grinned but ignored her. "How many people?"

She sighed. "None."

"And you were pretty torn up when Alucard killed those men."

She remembered the expression on their faces when Alucard laughed after the SWAT team fired multiple rounds into his chest and head. She knew they hadn't stood a chance; but they had no idea, these poor men, and watching the grim realization of their own deaths dawn on them felt like a new level of horror. She had tried to cover her ears against the screams. So much blood.

But even as she shared a seat and conversed with her Captain like a regular person, if she bothered to listen, she heard the rush of blood in his veins. The beat of his heart sounded as close to her as the cry of the wind. "Doesn't mean I'm not dangerous," she said.

"I'm not scared of you."

Seras sighed. "Maybe you should be."

He took one last drag off his cigarette and then crushed it into the pack. "I think not."

He inched closer and placed a hand on her shoulder. When she sent him a perplexed look, he shoved her arm.

Scowling, she barely budged. "What're you-"

With a grin, he gave her another light push. She caught herself on the corner of the bench before she went sideways into the grass. 

She leered at him. "Idiot!"

He laughed. "Big scary vampire my ass-"

Irritated, she put both hands on his side and shoved him back with a decent amount of force. 

He cursed and fell off the side of the bench as fast as if a big man had hit him. 

He smacked the ground hard. Seras scrambled to the edge and peered down at him, eyes wide. She hadn't meant to hurt him. "Captain?"

He lay sprawled on his back, long legs askew and thrown halfway off the bench. He laughed, a deep loud sound that forced her own lips upwards into a smile. "Owww. Bully," he grinned. "It's ok I deserved it. Think you crushed my cigarettes though."

She gave him an exasperated smile. His wide grin looked boyish on his face, sunny and carefree despite the eye patch and despite the scars, and it reduced her insides to mush. For a second he didn't look like a mercenary at all. "You started it," she giggled.

"I wanted to prove a point."

"Looks like I won."

With a groan he swung his legs off the bench and pushed himself to a stand, brushing the dirt from his sleeves. "You always beat my ass." He groped around his front pocket and found his precious the pack. "Little you. Fuck. You're amazing."

Seras blushed down to her toes. "Dunno about that."

He laughed. "You want to walk me back inside mignonette, keep me safe? The dawn is coming soon."

The thin slice of moon hovered high in the sky, and night drenched the old oak trees in darkness, but traces of lavender followed the clouds on the horizon. The first hint of birdsong wafted from the forest. Pip held out his hand. 

Seras took it. She liked the warm weight of his fingers clasped around her palm. It felt nice. It felt safe. 

"Am I sleeping alone tonight?"

She couldn't halt the pleasant tingle of butterflies in her stomach. With his accent, the words sounded more smooth than dirty. He had tossed the subject out in the open, without warning, blunt as usual. 

She kept her eyes glued on their clasped hands. She knew she couldn't avoid this conversation forever. "I thought you wouldn't want me anymore." She chewed her bottom lip. "I acted..not like myself."

"Ah, so you were avoiding me."

"I wasn't!"

He arched a brow.

"Ok maybe I was," she sighed. "I don't want you to think I'm some kind of...abomination."

He tightened his grip on her hand. "I'd never think that. I can't say I know what you're going through. But I'd never think that."

She stared up into his face. He watched her with a sincere expression, at ease but serious. "Really?" She whispered. Her voice sounded meek even to her own ears. 

"Really."

She tightened her fingers around his hand. Summoning every speck of bravery before the moment passed, she held his gaze with her eyes. "What're we doing Captain?" she whispered.

She didn't need to elaborate. He understood her implications. He gave her a soft smile, and in that second her heart felt whole again, unhindered by bad memories and free of pain's sharp edges. She thought of blue skies. "I don't know, amour de ma vie. Whatever you want."

Seras never had anyone look at her in the way her Captain did; men wanted her body, but nobody had ever seemed to peer straight past her appearance into her soul. She blushed and couldn't stop, cheeks deep pink. She felt she needed to say something but she might trip over her words. "Ok."

He seemed to understand this. He grinned and when she stood from the bench, he flipped her palm over, kissing  her knuckles. 

The soft press of his lips on her hand struck her speechless. 

His face broke into a lopsided grin. "I want to see you smile, Seras."

She giggled, she couldn't help it, she felt weird and giddy all over. She hadn't even wanted to pull her hand away. "You do a good job of making me do it Captain." 

He beamed at her and she hid part of her face with her hand. Her skin burned hot and she felt more alive and human than she had in weeks.

She let him lead her up the beaten path back towards the main house, hand in hand, like it was the most natural thing in the world. It embarrassed her but no one could see them in the dim light and it filled her chest with a warmth she liked. She didn't want it to end.

She snuck a glance at him. "You sure you want a vampire in your room?"

He smiled. She didn't think he had stopped smiling since they talked to begin with. "Positive. Just don't suck me dry. Well, not my blood anyway."

Seras made a face. "Ugh. You just couldn't help yourself." 

She fought the urge to hide her face. She probably should drink a drop of medical blood before bed. She didn't want to wake up on top of him tomorrow. She was pretty sure she could control herself, no problem.

 

**xxx**

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi. Sorry about the long wait. Life and stuff. /sweatdrop. I should be able to update fairly quickly now. Sorry if the writing isn't great I tried lol. I appreciate constructive criticism though very much! I don't have a beta. 
> 
> I have a tumblr too where I might post ideas or basic Hellsing shit. darkmignonette. My main is koisuru-kagome. I'd love if you add me if you'd like.
> 
> Don't bleed in bed with a vampire weird stuff happens lol  
>    
> Sorry about the derogatory words lol.  
> I think this chapter reflects how much I daydream about Pip lmao.
> 
> S/O to AmericanWildDog's "Whiskey in the Jar!" Awesome newer Pip x Seras fic along with some others! Thanks for your support man!
> 
> Boche - Offensive Slang. A German, especially a German soldier in World War I or World War II. [French, alteration of Alboche.]
> 
> THANKS FOR READING  
> THANK YOU  
> THANKS


	4. Roses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seras perspective, as she struggles with new feelings for her Captain.

The daylight had not touched Seras's skin in months, and the afternoon sun swept the yard in shades of green and blue. Gunfire split the quiet of Hellsing's practice field. Bullets riddled a cardboard target. Each time the gun kicked, Pip's body took the force, the bulk of his chest tense, the muscles in his arms flexing as he concentrated, staring through the scope with his one good eye. The sun darkened his skin from the midday heat, light scars stretched across his arms, the old wounds as decorative as war medals. A white t-shirt clung to his torso like a second skin. Sweat dropped down his temple, down his chest.

Seras frowned at him from her shaded spot under an oak. The sunlight stung her eyes and today she felt no desire to play target practice with the Geese. The potent blood of her Master prevented the sun from scorching her skin, and the soft dapples of sunlight through the leaves posed no threat.

The mercenaries often operated during the day, as humans needed the sun. Seras used to love a bright afternoon, cerulean skies and fluffy clouds, but now in her current state, her head pounded and all she wanted was to crawl under a rock somewhere. She hated it. Drowsiness clung to the back of her eyelids. Her instincts yearned for shadow and cold dirt, but she ignored the annoying persistence.

The rifles had been set down. Pip laughed at something his lieutenant said and the rest of the men broke out in obnoxious laughter. Seras shook her head. They acted like geese. Noisy. The Captain grinned, all signs of his previous concentration gone. He wasn't yelling at the men too much today, letting them joke and wander off topic. Seras watched him, his genuine smile, the long rope of his braid thrown over his shoulder. One of the men slapped him on the back in good nature. Pip cared about these men, she realized. And they cared about him. Captain Bernadotte's smile seemed to make the day brighter, but unlike the sun his light didn't sting her eyes.

His shirt stuck to the skin around his arms, the hemline damp across his broad chest. He didn't resemble a model, or a movie star exactly, his body more solid and cut from the toils of war and the need for strength, rather than aesthetic purposes; but he could have been a heart throb in another life. Seras knew he inherited his stature from his mercenary relatives, he had told her so; an imposing human from the ground up and also weaponized by a handsome, boyish grin. She would bet money that women flocked to him. She frowned as he leaned over and picked up a pack of cigarettes. The creases of his shoulder blades and the indentions of back muscles shown through his shirt. No, he definitely didn't hurt her eyes.

She felt heat rise to her face. Sometimes she woke up pressed to his hot skin but under the blankets and darkness of his frigid room she didn't much contemplate the hard lines of his body. Pip Bernadotte unfiltered under broad daylight however both scandalized and enticed her. Not that she would ever let him know.

She glared at him; was it just a rare warm day outside on the manor lawn, or was he being a show off on purpose? She couldn't tell. But she knew he knew she was there. Git.

As if remembering her presence, Pip caught her eye and grinned. She scowled at him. While the rest of the men took a break, he grabbed his jacket off the grass, tossed it across one shoulder and strode over to her. Her sour face didn't phase him at all.

Oh God, the Captain with his white shirt on his olive sun coated skin, smelling like blood and sweat and human male, coming over to talk with her. Flirt with her, shamelessly.

"Mignonette why are you outside?" He held a gloved hand over his lighter as he sparked a cigarette. "Today looks like too much sun for you."

His pretty accent melted some of her grumpiness. He hovered beside her under the wide reach of the oak. The scent of cut grass clung to him and she wondered if he would taste of earth and sunlight.

"I like to see a bright sky sometimes," she shrugged. Her eyes felt watery and her head throbbed, but otherwise her statement rang true.

Pip studied the sky above the stoic line of pine trees. "I guess. I like a sunrise myself."

Seras noticed the shift of his neck muscles when he turned his head. His heartbeat pulsed beneath his jaw. "Why a sunrise?"

"It's never the same," he spoke around his smoke. "Never the same mix of colors, and no matter where you are the sun will rise eventually."

She studied his expression for a moment. He stood beside her as his braid swayed in the breeze along with the branches.

He turned and flashed her a grin. "Watching the sunrise together is beautiful, eh?"

One eyebrow disappeared into her bangs. "You believe in romance?"

He shoved one hand in his pants pocket. He smiled at her. "No, but I've always wanted to."

The negative feelings dissipated almost instantly with his words, and she blushed. Smooth git. She stared down at her hands.

A shadow eclipsed her view; a soft weight fell around her head and shaded her face and arms from the sun.

His green military jacket was thick and it shielded her from direct light. "Use it, I don't need it."

Her skin cooled and her pores tingled in relief.

"Um.." She peered up at him, perplexed. He seemed as tall as her Master at this angle. "Thanks." She smiled and the light reached her eyes.

"De rien." Pip gently pulled the coat further around her pale shoulders. "You need the shadows ma cherie. Ok? That's just the way it is now."

A ruckus sounded from the yard. One of the Geese had tripped over a branch and smacked his face on the ammo transportation cart. A round of laughter and bitching commenced.

They spotted Pip and Seras on top of the hill by the slope of trees. "Captain! Your smoke break done yet?"

Another mercenary laughed. "A 'smoke break'?"

"He means go pester the Police Girl, that's what he means."

"Not fair!"

"He'd rather ditch us so he can go flirt. Shame on you Captain!"

"I think my head is bleeding."

Seras yanked the jacket down around her red cheeks and hid most of her face.

"Idiots." Pip looked irritated and he clutched the bridge of his nose between two fingers. He mumbled darkly in French until he raised his voice. "You girls need me up your asses all times don't you?!"

They ignored his comment. "Be careful Seras!" His lieutenant decided to goad him further. "He's a dog, sweetheart!"

An awkward chuckle broke past her lips. She pretended like the last remark wasn't directed at her and leaned back onto the base of the tree.

"Oh shut up!" He flipped them off, and they just cackled from a safe distance. He muttered what sounded like more curses under his breath. "One moment ma cherie." He stomped down the hill to attend to his men.

"Seras," she reminded. She had almost given up on the fight against his pet names at this point, but when in front of others the terms of endearment(and he used many) embarrassed her still. He never called her by a cutesy name in front of anyone at Hellsing, but he did fling endearments at her while they were around his men. At the end of the day she always wondered if his habit was a thinly veiled attempt to mark her as exclusivity his.

She didn't really want to be a trophy in some men's pissing contest but if that kept the other mercenaries from driving her nuts than so be it. Most of them meant well, but nobody was getting in her skirt.

They bandaged up Craig, the poor bloke who had dived headfirst into the side of metal. Another merc scavenged some cigarettes from their Captain. The scent of warm grass and the earth beneath her legs lulled her into a light slumber as she drifted off, the presence of a sun almost like a tranquilizer to her undead senses.

Maybe fifteen minutes passed before she heard his approaching footfalls on the grass. Her hearing detected traces of insects in the dirt as they scrambled away from his boots. She opened her eyes.

"Everything alright?" She asked, and peeked at him from beneath her bangs.

Pip scoffed and plopped down beside her. His movement stirred the air around her body and flooded her personal space with the natural scent of his skin. She swallowed the sudden influx of saliva in her mouth. The part of her primitive brain yearned to suck on the skin between his neck and shoulders, drag her fangs across the penetrable muscle of his chest, and her instincts knew it.

"They're idiots." He propped his head up with one arm, elbow braced on his knee. "They fuck around too much. They need to take this vampire shit serious."

Regret stung her heart when she recalled the funeral of the men killed after the Valentine Brothers broke in and turned the whole mansion into a lucid nightmare; there had been so much blood. She didn't want to talk about all that death right now.

"Do they know what happened to our previous security here?"

"We were informed but I don't think they really get it yet." He shook his head.

"I'm not enough proof?"

Pip chuckled. "You don't strike the cold fear of vampires into their hearts, no."

She wasn't surprised. "What about Master?"

A look of pure dread flashed across his face and she almost laughed. "You don't have to tell me twice," he grumbled. "I had to sit near that lunatic bastard on the plane."

Seras scowled at him. "At least you weren't shoved in a corpse box and thrown down in the luggage."

Pip shrugged. "In hindsight I should have traded you seats."

Seras smirked. She could only imagine the long uneasy ride home with the Captain petrified of the No Life King, and Alucard soaking in the perfume of his fear. "Did he bother you?"

"He didn't really bother me like you mean no, but he still did bother me. Fucker creeps me out."

She giggled. "Me too sometimes."

He groped in his pockets for his Lucky Strikes. "The men have seen some fucked up shit, but they aren't ready to accept that there are darker things in existence besides other men with guns. Alucard seems to stay away from us. Fuckin praise to God."

"Probably so he wont be tempted. Sir Integra ordered him not to eat you guys."

He paled and regarded her with a deadpan expression. "Well I hope that means he won't."

"Don't worry, he listens to anything she says. He has to, he's under a 'magical seal.' Or something of the sort."

"Oh I know exactly what that means."

"Do you really?"

"No."

Seras laughed. "Like a spell or something."

Pip frowned. "I have a hard time believing any abracadabra bullshit can control big fangs."

"I honestly thinks he enjoys it. He loves Sir Integra bossing him around. He seems to anyways."

Pip lit his cigarette and leaned back, propping himself up by his elbows. His expression turned thoughtful. "That's weird."

Seras nodded. "I don't much understand their relationship. Maybe Walter knows. He's been here longer than anyone else...besides Master obviously."

Pip regarded her with an oddly passive expression. "So he's after his boss then after all. You and him aren't involved."

"'Involved?'"

"You know..lovers."

Seras gawked at him. "No! No that's..." Her skin broke out in gooseflesh. "I do not have that sort of relationship with him. Why on earth would you think that?"

Her Captain's face brightened somewhat. "All the 'master' stuff."

"Not that kind of master." She glowered at him from beneath the shade of his jacket. "We're vampires! I'm his fledgling." She cast her eyes down. She hadn't meant to use terminology that made them sound like wild animals, nor remind her Captain of her own freakish inheritance.

She felt irritated. She couldn't believe he had been worried about that this whole time. She almost blurted 'well I stay in your bed stupid, not his, don't I!?' But she composed herself.

Pip didn't seem taken aback or bothered by her statement. A calm expression rested across his face, his braid like a rope of woven silk as it laid across his solid abdomen and trailed down into the creases of his trousers. His one green eye matched the green of the trees. He finally spoke again. "He never hurts you then?"

Seras blinked. She didn't know where that question had come from either. "No, except for when I was made into what I am now. But I was dying. I was a hostage. He shot me to kill the rogue vampire and I was in the way." She plucked a few strands of grass with her fingertips.

She had said too much. Oops. "It...doesn't matter."

Pip studied her with a heavy expression she couldn't gauge, and unease shifted in her stomach. "It does matter ma cherie. It's alright."

Seras swallowed a lump in her throat. "Right now thanks to my terrible luck I should be dead, but I'm alive thanks to Master, and Sir Integra."

She held her hands up to her left breast and with her hands demonstrated the size of the wound. "Half my chest was blown off. One big hole. I heard the shot and felt the pain but I hadn't realized what had happened. All I knew is that I wanted to live."

She glanced up at his face with apprehension. She felt like she was over sharing. Nobody cared about her problems, nobody ever had before; she couldn't expect any different this time. She hadn't intended to blurt details about that horrid night.

Pip's mouth hung on his face in a grim line, but with a jolt of realization she noticed soft emotion glazed over the green depths of his eye; not pity, something more akin to regret as well as a raw emotion that cooled the painful burns of the past still scorched into chambers of her heart.

"Remind me to thank that master of yours," he said around a small smile.

Tension fled from her shoulders. When confronted with her past most people recoiled in horror, or pitied her to the point of never treating her the same again. Naturally over time she learned to not talk about it at all. Her Captain's lack of outburst surprised her. She smiled. "For what?"

He reached into one of the random pockets in his work pants and pulled out a single, somewhat squashed rose. Seras froze in place.

Grinning, he inched closer and gently tucked the flower into the hair above her ear. "For keeping you in this world mignonette." His smile spread into a lopsided grin, and she thought she detected a hint of embarrassment in his expression, for once. His soft voice caused a riot of happy nervous butterflies in her stomach. "I'm happy our paths crossed Seras."

She went as rigid as a scared rabbit. She knew her face had to be a lovely shade of tomato red at this point. "T-thanks..."

"You're a survivor." He seemed much closer now than a moment ago. "The world would be much darker ma cherie, without your beautiful eyes."

She shivered from the sound of his voice so close to her own skin. She liked the thought of letting him peer into the depths of her heart, letting him see her deepest scars, and the corruption that had surely marred pieces of her soul.

At this proximity she studied the variations of green and flecks of yellow in his lone iris, and the start of stubble across his jaw and around his mouth. She noticed the slight fullness and soft Cupid's bow of his lips for the first time. An impulse to scrape her teeth across his mouth and taste the texture, the lines and dips of his lips almost overpowered her control. The sweat around his mouth would taste like salt and she would like it.

She jerked her head aside, blushing. 'I wanted to kiss him just then. Really I did.' Her feeble pulse fluttered at her throat. Her heart somehow had begun beating again like she had some silly schoolgirl crush.

She couldn't bring herself to look at him. She inched herself away, out of his immediate personal space but near enough to continue conversation. She didn't want him to feel rejected, regardless of...his flirting or whatever that was...

If he felt put off by her blundering, he didn't show it. He smiled, as if he expected her shyness. He probably was used to it by now.

Her mind raced for something to say. Something not lame or dumb. She remembered the white rose tucked above her ear. "Where did you even get this from? I haven't seen roses anywhere here before."

"There's a big patch of them behind that storage building. I guess they have grown wild by now. It's hard to kill roses."

She blushed. "Well um. Thanks." She paused for a moment. "'Thoughtful of you."

He looked carefree as always, even with the occasional scar across his arms, his posture nonchalant next to her as if he didn't know his body called to her in ways that promised only satisfaction.

"Thoughtful?" He laughed. "Only for you."

Only for me? She found that hard to believe. A small wry smirk crossed her lips. "So you're not really a dog, like the Geese said?"

Pip grinned but she noticed the wince in his expression. "The men like to talk shit."

"You do have a smooth tongue though don't you Captain?"

"Maybe? Why mignonette, I'm so glad you think so." He beamed at her.

Shit.

The Captain laughed again, a masculine sound but light hearted. "Ma petite Seras. No need for jealousy." He wiggled his eyebrows.

"Not jealous."

"I've never met a woman like you."

He had spoken it like a compliment, but she wasn't sure, thinking it could be a comment on her vampirism. But he probably didn't mean vampire. Of course he had never seen a vampire before. He meant her, herself, as an individual. Somehow she knew that. Because she knew him.

"Well I've never met a man like you before either Captain." A pedigree mercenary brave enough to work with the supernatural, who also laughs in abandon and picks her white roses.

"We make a good pair then eh?"

"'Suppose so."

She paused. A large grin crossed his face. Seras smiled in response, his smile was so damn infectious, she couldn't help it. After all the gloom and doom of her recent unlife she never imagined she would get a day in the sunlight(somewhat), laughing with this man, her friend, and her heart beating again like a living woman.

To her surprise, he didn't tease her about it. Nothing about them being a pair of mated Geese or anything ridiculous like that for once.

He rose to his feat, a tall and wide shadow above her. "I know you don't like it ma cherie but let's go inside. You need the dark. You can go to my room. I'll walk you there."

He said that because he knew she liked his bed immensely more than the stiff confinement of her coffin. He had put up blackout curtains for her, which didn't seem too badly suspicious, as he and the other men slept during the days sometimes as well.

Deep down, more than anything, she loved the comforting scent of him embedded into the sheets covering her body, every object in the room marked by his touch. She slept wrapped up in what almost felt like safety. When he joined her, the tension fled from her muscles, his snores like a semblance of normalcy, and it felt even better.

"Sure."

xxx

In a back hallway, trying to shuffle their way to the Captain's room, they happened to walk upon Walter as he ran errands for Integra. He carried a folder stuffed fat with documents under his elbow, his vest and tie ironed and perfect. Seras never recoiled when she interacted with the Angel of Death, despite how he had almost fooled her with the nice old man facade, almost fooled the Valentine brothers too, until he had taught them all a lesson about razor wire.

However, she had not meant to bump into him while the Captain insisted on chatting with her the entire way to his room.

"Good afternoon. Captain I see you're adjusting well. Awake at this hour Seras?" He raised an eyebrow.

Seras ducked her head. "Just for today. I won't make it a habit."

"Right. Well, everyone worries. Sir Integra especially."

Pip sighed. "I tried to tell this girl. She 'don't listen to me."

Seras hid the urge to roll her eyes at Pip's comment.

As a butler and as an assassin Walter noticed her absence at times, noticed her whereabouts and schedule. He had to know she spent time with the mercenary; but did he know how much? Would he even care to blab to Integra?

"Ah, I see the old rose garden is still flowering."

Her mind blanked until she remembered the flower still wedged in her hair. Pink spots flared on her cheeks. "Y-yeah." She touched the feather weight petals with her fingertips.

The skin over his eyebrows wrinkled as his look turned thoughtful. "It hasn't been tended to in years. The late Arthur Hellsing used to have afternoon tea there. But I recall only red blooms, not white."

"I think I found the only white one in there to be honest." Pip's look turned mischievous. "The white suits her better, you think?"

Seras wanted to punch him in the arm but she didn't want to bicker or act immature in front of her older colleague.

Walter didn't look phased. "Oh most definitely. Very lovely. Well, if you'll excuse me. And Captain Sir Integra needs to speak with you in the office, about the injury from this afternoon."

Pip pinched the bridge of his nose. "Damn. Craig. Fuckin idiot." He sighed. "Thanks Walter."

If Walter thought anything about them was worthy of suspicion, he didn't comment on it.

The Captain walked her the rest of the way to his room, their conversation cut short by the interruption of Pip's actual job, and he seemed put off by it.

At the threshold of his door, before Seras could stop herself they locked gazes once more. She hovered in shadow with his bed in the background, a cold and sterile environment compared to the constant breath of the outside world. Pip had brought it in with him, the scent of vigorous life and heat clinging to his clothes and hair. The corridor felt unnaturally silent. She heard the thumping of his pulse.

She felt her own heat, a low coiling warmth in her abdomen, made worse by the echo of desire in his stare. Logically she knew she possessed a body men wanted, as annoying as it was most of the time, she knew it to be true. And Pip was only a mortal man. But for once in her life, she wanted him too, and it made her body feel weird and respond weird. She felt completely out of her element.

It would be so easy to take his hand in hers and pull him into the shadows and he would no doubt follow and they would fall into the cold sheets and she could touch him and they could spark heat in the room together with their flesh like a miniature sun. Maybe he would make her see stars.

Her nipples hardened. Seras coughed. "I-I-I..I should sleep um...j-just come in here later. For sleeping. I mean when you're done. We can sleep together."

He grinned but his expression remained soft, full of affection that made her feel both warm and afraid. "Alright mignonette."

She shut the door so hard it slammed on accident and she winced. He must have known she meant literally sleeping together, and not any of the perverted stuff she had just been thinking about. The hell was wrong with her? 

She listened to his footsteps echo down the hall, thinking of him long after he had gone, until she crashed into dreamless slumber. One bright rose sat like a forgotten ornament on his nightstand, tangled with strands of blond hair, next to a polaroid of a young Pip smiling with the Geese. 

 


	5. Maidens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A meeting between Hellsing members ruffles some feathers. And Pip gains more insight about Seras, and vampires in general.

Pip Bernadotte appreciated the comfortable benefits of working for the Hellsing Organization, he couldn’t deny that. He leaned as far back as he could in an old leather chair that smelled like smoke and musk. A meeting was better than being shot at first thing in the morning as far as he was concerned. He was temped to rest his boots on the table out of habit but with Sir Integra poised at her desk and Alucard looming behind her he thought he'd better not push it. He didn't want to scuff the boss's table, lest his face get bitten off by Alucard.

Strategizing in advance with the boss, her lunatic monster and the Angel of Death felt unlike anything he had ever experienced; to be in the same room as these wildly powerful individuals set adrenaline firing through his blood. During his career, during his life, he had fought cut throat men, and Pip Bernadotte himself had been born and raised a killer but compared to the three individuals in this room, he realized such things had been the petty strife of mortals.

Still, he earned his pay, and the fat checks kept coming. When the opportunity had first been brought to his attention, he had been skeptical. A private security job in England, cushiony barracks in a mansion, benefits and an outrageously high pay?

It was a suspicious contract in a subtle way which had both piqued his interest and set him on guard. It all sounded too easy. He knew it, the men knew it, but they were sick of sandy death traps and the idea of a sudden spike in cash had tempted everyone.

The calm, proper English voice of the old man should have alleviated the strange sense of unease in him, as he made a long distance collect call from a filthy phone booth to set up a meeting with their mysterious new benefactor, but if anything the dignified politeness of the old butler and the semblance of normalcy around the situation had increased Pip’s restlessness.

Of course when he’d finally been informed that a requirement for working at the secretive ‘Hellsing Organization’ included guarding the manor from supernatural threats, Pip had brushed aside his caution. He thought, ‘ok, we’ll get paid a hefty sum of money to protect an old rich man from his paranoia. Why not?'

He didn’t expect he’d ever have to lay down blood for this job. How foolish.

He thought back to the emergency round table meeting with the queen(the actual bloody queen of England!). The horrid screams still echoed in his ears, late at night, following him down into the darkness of slumber like clinging devils. There had been too many bloody inhuman mouths on that little screen; they ate a man as he died.

He loved outwitting the enemy. But this time, after that lovely horror show, he finally realized he didn't know if this fox and his old tricks could outsmart these ravenous animals.

Not many jobs ruminated in his mind day in and day out, while he ate or took a piss or drank a beer, always he schemed over counter measures, artillery barrages, any way to insure the least amount of Geese casualties. No contract had ever instilled such a sense of dread in him, a knifepoint of fear hovering over his throat every time he lay awake alone in bed.

Nobody in his family ever told him how to deal with this shit. Not any shit like this. He was no goddamn vampire slayer.

Landmines. He discussed more details about a minefield with Sir Integra today, as a last resort in case of an attack on the manor: if the artificial vampires couldn’t heal, then use explosives to disintegrate them from a safe distance.

He normally pulled no satisfaction from the spectacle of average soldiers getting blown up by shrapnel, goodbye ya poor bastards, hello paycheck, but this time...he hoped these freaks suffered as their fleshed seared away into dust. He hated them. He hated them so much his rage ran wild through his thoughts at night, making him ponder useless theological bullshit. If God is real, why in Christ’s name are these monsters allowed to exist? All the while mad priests screamed and raged about the wrath and punishment of God. God’s justice. What fucking justice?

These were maniacs, out for pure destruction. No trace of morale or fear, no political incentive, their aim only the mass senseless death of children, women, anyone and everyone. By a bad streak of luck (or fate), the Geese found themselves up against a psycho, super-powered foe. Vampires. His mind sometimes still wrestled with the factual existence of vampires.

What the fuck did he know anymore really?

He took a long drag from his cigarette. Alucard aka Satan incarnate may eventually be needed outside the home base. The manor left unguarded by Hellsing’s trump card...They might run into some problems, to put it fucking lightly.

Being the Captain, the weight of his men’s lives rested solely on his shoulders as they all stood balanced upon a razor’s edge, and ever since the round table meeting, that edge had begun to dig into his skin, cutting into the pads of his feet, wearing him down. And if he buckled and fell, he’d drag all his men down with him.

He gathered his thoughts back to the present moment as he stared into the frigid blue eyes of Sir Integra, so unlike the gentle sapphire gaze of his mignonette.

Pip cleared his throat, exhaling a puff of smoke. "We still have an ace up our sleeves: Ms. Seras."

Alucard stopped his pacing behind Integra. He barked out a harsh laugh. "You think the Police girl trembling in her boots is gonna save your miserable hides." He grinned but it more resembled a sneer.

Pip stiffened. "She's stronger than any of my men put together."

"You're right. She is." His eyes glimmered like rubies, if gemstones could be cursed with an unholy heat. "And even as she cries like a scared child, your men will be the ones going A.W.O.L."

"Alucard." Integra paused over whatever document she was assessing and shot him a warning glance.

Pip felt cold fear seep through his limbs but he only regarded the tall vampire with a steady, neutral gaze. ' _As if he'd ever let his men desert_.'

Alucard grinned to himself, his molten eyes fixed on Pip as he crept over to Sir Hellsing. He lowered his tone. "An attack on the manor and you humans will be slaughtered. The Police girl, oh wait, ' _mignonette_ ,' can't save you." He laughed again.

Pip stiffened. ' _How did he-'_

Integra frowned at her servant with a slightly confused, but irritated expression. "What? What did I just say?" she snapped.

"Oh but Master, I'm only stating the truth."

Sir Hellsing preceded to scold him, much to Alucard's bemusement(which only fueled his boss’s irate mood) as Pip’s thoughts wandered off. Surely Seras would never tell her master of his personal nicknames for her, she would be way too embarrassed, for one thing.

Not that Pip particularly cared Alucard had used his feelings to mock him. Suddenly the dull chill of the room crawled up his arms. His issue was, Big Red apparently had pulled Pip's thoughts, intimate thoughts guarded within the very confines of brain tissue, out from his skull, and he’d noticed nothing.

Despite himself a tinge of anger at the vampire clouded his reasoning. His tone remained restricted with calm however, he was no idiot. "I don't appreciate you reading my mind."

Pip tried to keep the trembling in his body to only his legs hidden under the table. He expected a nasty remark of some sort, but Alucard only grinned at him in a slow malicious show of teeth. The mercenary honestly could never tell if the vampire found him tolerable, stupid, or hated his very existence. He’d probably never know.

“Alucard. Enough. I grow tired of your games."

Alucard chuckled to himself. "Whatever you say, Master."

Unbothered, he sauntered over to a huge dark leather chair and reclined on it with the preternatural grace of a big cat. He tipped a wine glass to his lips and refreshed himself with cold, thick blood. Integra eyed him with disdain, though her attention lingered on the vampire's pale throat as he drained the glass, head tilted back as if lost in a fleeting moment of pleasure.

Pip scowled and crushed his cigarette in the fine crystal ashtray on the table. He sparked another one with trembling fingers.

Integra sighed. "Walter, do you agree or disagree with the Captain, concerning Seras.”

The old man lingered by Sir Integra's side, as always quiet unless spoken to. But Pip knew nothing escaped the notice of the Angel of Death, either. “I'm merely a servant, madam."

"I'm only asking your opinion."

"Right." Muscles drew the wrinkled skin around his eyes tight. "Well, I do think Seras stationed here at the manor may prove to be an advantage, but only time will tell. There is potential there, but her general refusal to drink blood is a problem."

Alucard made an irritated 'hmph' sound from across the room but otherwise refrained from commenting. Pip knew the master vampire badgered Seras over her naïveté. It was a long, old battle.

Integra considered his words as she lit one of her small cigars. The smoke scented the air with thick oriental spice.

Words tumbled from Pip’s mouth before he could recall them. "I've been working with her on that issue."

They all looked at him at once.

Alucard burst out with dark laughter. “How Frenchman?" He mocked. "Do you offer her your blood?"

A red flush spread up from under his collar. He was also afraid the vampire would again invade his mind. "No. Not quite. I remind her that she needs to take care of herself, which means drinking blood, but I don’t make a huge deal of it. It’s just fucking medical blood. And if for some reason she has to kill a person for it, so what? I’ve got the blood of countless men on my hands, and I don’t even need it to live.”

Sir Integra's face took on a measured look. Alucard's attention burned a hole into the side of his head but Pip tried his best to ignore him. "She's not like us, you know.” He pulled a long satisfying drag from his cigarette. "Every one of us in this room is a killer."

Alucard sneered. "Careful, Frenchman."

"Alucard," Integra warned, and the vampire quieted. She regarded the Captain with her glacier eyes.

"Am I wrong? Unlike us, the girl has a sweet nature. Her head was filled with that ‘good cop’ nonsense. And you people turned her into a vampire.” He shrugged. “I don’t see how you’re surprised over the way she struggles. She’s not inclined to inhumanity and bloodshed.”

Alucard scoffed. "There's no mortal in existence that lacks a penchant for violence, no matter how far down it's buried in their hearts. It's there, festering. Humans have feared and killed each other since the dawn of time, and will continue to do so for eons to come. You should know that better than anyone, _mercenary_."

Pip gazed down at the desk in front of him without really seeing it. He knew that the vampire was not wrong, but he also believed that the heart of the mortal, compassionate Seras animated her chilled flesh. But he didn’t know how to explain that to these people, his boss, nor did he want to.

The vampire tapped his long gloved fingertips on his armrest. "You only think this stupidity of hers is blameless because you haven't seen or touched innocence in a long time, probably never in your pitiful life. So now, you tail after her like a kicked dog." A sneer touched the corners of his lips. "If you can't see that, Frenchman, you're as much of a fool as her. Oh, and maybe she failed to mention the fact that her vampirism was ultimately her choice. The alternative outcome? Those blue eyes rotted in the grave with worms.”

Pip flinched.

“Alucard!” Disgust flashed across Integra’s face. Walter just frowned, looking like he had tasted something sour.

Pip had become as desensitized to human decay as any other soldier of fortune, but never in a million years did he ever need the mental image of Seras’s pretty face bloated and putrid in the ground. He didn’t know if his own fucked up brain had cruelly added her features to the countless cadavers, civilian casualties, he had seen in his time, (women and children in rags sprawled broken in ditches), or if the monster had planted that grisly image into his mind on purpose. Maybe the vampire’s disturbing words alone had been enough to elicit that nightmarish thought. He wouldn’t be surprised.

But he had also never told anyone aside from Seras herself how much he loved her blue eyes.

Alucard’s wasn’t wrong, deep down Pip knew he never could deserve the sunshine that was Seras Victoria; not as a man buried neck deep in debauchery and death, and a world devoid of her light seemed nothing more than a tragic farce.

Sir Integra frowned in a stern line, her composure regained though a heaviness lingered in her eyes. "Alucard you’re already a walking horror show as it is, I don’t need any more of that gruesome talk. And stop tormenting the Captain. That’s an order.”

“As you wish, my Master. My apologies. For clarification, you mean that I can never torment the Frenchman again or just not again _today_?”

“Never again.”

“I understand. My sincerest apologies for disturbing you Master.”

‘ _Yeah right_.’ Pip suppressed the urge to roll his one good eye. He had an inherent suspicion the creepy bastard was in fact, not sorry at all. But regardless he appreciated his Boss telling her mad dog to heel.

Integra took off her glasses and rubbed between her eyes with her fingertips. “This meeting didn't need a philosophical conversation, or any of this, you idiots." She sighed. "As I was saying, Captain if you think you can break through to Seras and convince her to stop starving herself, then by all means continue."

“I’ll do my best,” he stated simply. He hated to corrupt her naïveté but for her own sake he would gladly be the bearer of corruption, though it left a bad taste in his mouth. _‘If you want to live boy, you’d better pick up your weapon and kill your brother for money. There is no other way. There has never been nor ever will be another way for you. We are the scum of the earth boy_.’

If Pip was being honest with himself, he’d do anything to keep mignonette walking this earth.

Alucard studied him with a fixed, impassive stare. 

“Alucard,” Integra warned. “Why don’t you manifest yourself out of my office. You’ve tested my patience enough for today.”

Pip would never understand how she carried on unphased by the immense pressure of Alucard's hellfire eyes.

Alucard propped his head up on his elbow and met her scowl with a lazy grin. Pure black hair in long tangles covered half his forearm. “As you wish my Master,” he purred, tone drenched in mischief and dark humor, and almost thickly sweet. “Forgive me, the lovely spark of your anger proves addicting.”

Pip blanched. Oh, how nice and unsettling that was. The worshipful manner in which the vampire sometimes addressed Sir Integra never failed to creep him out.

Integra pointedly ignored him, though a rosey flush had spread up her neck from underneath the pinned cross at her cravet. She resumed signing the discarded stack of papers on her desk with quick angry flicks of her pen.

When Pip glanced in Alucard’s direction, the leather chair sat unoccupied in the corner, the wine glass forgotten and smeared with blood; the crimson rim of the crystal the only indication he had ever been there at all.

Pip ignored the onslaught of goosebumps that rushed up and down his arms and back. He wondered how long it would be until he got used to this shit, if ever.

Of course Sir Integra carried on unbothered. “Captain, regarding the land mines, I’ll have Walter bring you the detailed maps of the grounds outside.”

Pip sat up further in his chair. “Great. I’ll study them.” The Geese used minefields to their advantage a few times before, but at this point he wasn’t certain even explosives could affect vampires, with all their mind reading, superhuman, nefarious ways.

He paused. “And you’re certain these bastards aren’t going to keep coming at us after they pick up the last pieces of their limbs off the lawn?”

She gave him a side glance that resembled a leer. “I’m quite positive I know about vampires Captain, even these artificial ones. And they can’t regenerate.”

Pip didn’t want to press his irritated boss further, especially not after Alucard had already pushed her buttons, but he lagged behind on the topic of supernatural entities compared to everyone else in this madhouse. “Remind me of the differences? Give it to me straight.”

She shot him a flat look but didn’t object. She resumed her writing and continued. “They’re weaker; they cannot regenerate, every one of their victims becomes a ghoul regardless of gender, age, or purity. Even after the vampire is exterminated the ghouls will continue their unholy assault upon others. Compare this to a true vampire; full regenerative power, ghouls are tied to the will of the vampire and will perish with the vampire. True undead are made by the bite of a true vampire to a virgin of the opposite sex.”

Pip had always prided himself on his professionalism, but one particular tidbit of information just pivoted his thoughts into an entirely different direction. “I’m sorry- what?” He shook his head. “You said a...virgin?”

Integra hadn’t looked up from her desk. “Yes, vampires are only made from virgins.”

The rhythm of his pulse begin to quicken. “What...does that mean?” The question slipped softly from his lips when he hadn’t meant to state it out loud.

From the sidelines Walter stifled half a chuckle.

Integra stopped her workings entirely and glowered down at the mercenary from behind her glasses. “Captain I’m not going to sit here and explain to you what a virgin is. You know damn well what a virgin is. I don’t understand the rhyme or reason behind it, but I know that’s how it works for the undead, I assume it’s a mockery of innocence under God.”

Pip tried to regain a semblance of composure, even as thoughts raced behind his eye like shadows. Seras Victoria, a virgin?

He shrugged but the movement almost felt too rigid to be believable. “Alright, I got it. The devil likes untouched pussy and the fake freaks only make ghouls.”

Integra shot him a flat look for his unnecessarily crude comment before resuming her paperwork. “Glad you’ve caught up,” she said dryly.

Pip gnawed on his bottom lip. His thoughts drifted. No wonder why Seras always blushed like a scandalized schoolgirl when the men cracked dirty jokes or talked about their many escapades with whores. Pip hadn’t credited any deeper meaning to it, if anything he figured Seras wasn’t the type to associate with ruffian mercenaries under normal circumstances.

But he hadn’t realized her cute prudish behavior was from a point blank total lack of sex. Hell, by sixteen years old Pip had charmed his way up the skirts of all the girls in town(well those enticed rather than repulsed by his family’s reputation anyway.) He couldn’t fathom how Seras had gone on with her life insofar without carnal pleasure.

She never took him up on his casual advances either. Not the blatant ones in the beginning, and not the subtle hints for it now.

He knew mignonette trusted him as her Captain, a comrade in arms, and he would dare say even as a security blanket but as a lover? He held her in his arms, her back to his front while she lay dead to the world, the sweet jasmine scent of her hair a comfort to his own racking dreams. But she never once rolled over and faced him, aligning their bodies, her touches never trailed down his belly or past his hips.

Unfortunately of course he couldn’t solve her shitty problems or fix her horrendous luck, he could only fuck her into a state of rapture strong enough to expel her personal torment, if only for a little while.

But if she didn’t want him, she didn’t want him. C’est la vie. It stung. But he wouldn’t blame mignonette for his own blatant stupidity, falling for a woman while under a job contract, an _exceptionally dangerous_  contract at that. She was too good for him anyway; that was a stone cold fact.

Except now Sir Integra had just unknowingly dropped another missing piece of the puzzle that was Seras Victoria. Perhaps after all in her heart of hearts mignonette held feelings for him close against herself, within the fortress of her own defenses.

‘ _Yeah right, ya dog. Wishful thinking._ ’

This new info also confused the shit out of him regarding that particular incident from a few weeks ago: he had awoken to the sight of her shapely legs on either side of his hips, her mouth locked around two of his fingers, tongue an aggressive wet appendage worshipping his skin, crawling over his hand. Lust sizzled in the depths of his body at the mere thought of that encounter. Especially when he thought about how she-

Well regardless neither of them had brought it up since, aside from that single wonderfully amusing and awkward conversation. They hadn’t slept together but she had acted as if they had. Endearing, but Pip wasn’t stupid enough to mention it again.

He was pretty sure she had been caught up in some kinda vampire thing anyways. But, since it had drenched his mind in erotic thoughts and images for days, apparently the blood aspect didn’t matter much to his dick. ‘ _Damn Pip Bernadotte. That’s a new kind of fucked up eh_?’

Integra had moved on from the subject while Pip had gathered his thoughts. “Walter, it’s abit late but would you still mind bringing the afternoon tea?”

“Of course not ma’am.”

Her piercing gaze settled on him, though her words were mere courtesy. “Tea Captain?”

He gave a polite smile. He never understood the English and their tea rituals. “Thanks but no thanks.”

Walter’s eyes slid to the mercenary and he seemed to hesitate for half a moment, before leaving with a quiet click of the door.

He noted that he had never been left alone with the boss before, not that it mattered. Unlike the deranged eyes of her servant, the knight’s steady gaze didn’t repulse him, though he always felt humbled under the uncomfortable weight of her iron presence, regardless of her admittedly beautiful face. He’d met plenty of dangerous individuals, but they had been lowly individuals, fighting in the dirt like everyone else, not higher ups with the power to incite either peace or atrocity. Real power like that had always been entirely above his head.

This organization and the Convention of Twelve probably jerked the strings of the ignorant populace around like marionettists.

Not like that was his problem.

“A word of caution,” she began. From the window behind her chair, clouds billowed over the sun, cloaking the room with sudden dim shade. “And I’d rather not have this conversation repeated to anyone either.”

His eyebrows raised up under his bangs. “..Alright.”

He didn’t know where this was going. Unease settled like a rock in his stomach. He knew that in this cursed mansion, the shadows around Integra always had eyes. Her Servant never lurked far from his beloved Master.

For all this worry, her voice remained as impassive as always. “As of right now Seras Victoria is unstable.” She withdrew one of her cigarillos from the tin box at her desk.

His heart sped up a pace. He hadn’t expected Integra to bring up the subject of Seras yet again.

“Until she drinks, her vampiric nature could rear its volatile head at any moment and frankly if you happen to be there at the wrong time, you or your men will find yourselves in a sour situation.” She lit the tobacco with a quick flick of her lighter. “Just so you’re aware. In case you’ve forgotten. Though if you haven’t already gotten a glimpse of the madness, I’d consider myself surprised.”

The memory of empty crimson eyes hovering over him in the dark like hellish will-o-wisps, unperceiving to all things except blood, crossed his mind.

She must have seen it reflected on his face. “I thought so. You’re a braver man than most Captain, but I advise a larger dose of caution.”

He slung an arm behind the back of his chair. “You’re saying you think she’ll snap on me one day, like a wild animal?”

“Not intentionally. But she grapples with internal forces beyond our comprehension. Alucard’s powerful blood dominates everything and anything.”

Pip regarded her for a moment while he plucked a cigarette from his front coat pocket. “But the Police girl...she is not Alucard, n'est-ce pas?”

A sudden heaviness settled into her features. She surmised him with a look akin to pity. “No she’s not, but they’re both cut from the same dark cloth.”

He didn’t like this conversation already. “I was under the impression you wanted me to help her.”

“I only agreed because you volunteered yourself, for whatever reason. Walter said you’ve not asked for any extra payment for your troubles, so it’s fine. All I’m advising you Captain is simple: don’t disregard the fact that Seras is undead.” She exhaled a heavy sigh. “I get it. I have eyes. Whereas Alucard inspires terror with a single glance, the same can’t be said for our Police Girl. She’s not inherently threatening. Not at first. But truthfully Captain vampires always have been seductive creatures. They charm their way into your bed and onto your throat.”

He regarded her with quiet surprise, the unlit cigarette poised forgotten in one hand. He didn’t know what to say.

The truth of her statement twisted a dagger in his gut. After Seras had left that night he had gotten himself off with the same hand saturated in her saliva, ignoring the inhuman expression that had marred her face, ignoring the fading indentations of her teeth on his skin.

The dreary grey afternoon light faded beyond the window, withdrawing behind Sir Integra’s high backed chair as darkness touched down with the naked tree line. “Mortals and immortals..” she whispered, with a solemn tilt of her head. “It always ends in tragedy.”

Pip stared at her, for a moment wondering what life must feel like from the perspective of Integra Hellsing; a woman burdened by duty, owned by the Church of England, while in turn owning an ancient darkness, knowing how it covets your every breath with the madness of a fallen king. Yet Integra’s icey stares thawed into something tangible whenever the No Life King slunk to her side with his reverential praises.

' _In other words, don’t love the vampires_.' Surely the boss hadn’t missed the irony of her statement. But her personal business wasn’t any of his business.

Sir Hellsing was right, he knew he had become dangerously close to Seras. In the middle of hostile tension no less, with the power of hell’s legion ripened for onslaught at any moment. His grandfather would have outright laughed at him. ‘ _Qui court deux lievres a la fois, n’en prend aucun_.'

He hoped the vulnerability didn’t show on his face as he lowered his gaze, vaguely looking at but not seeing the frayed wallpaper behind her desk.

A sharp bergamot scent flooded the room. Walter had returned with a platter of fine china and tiny sandwiches.

Integra cleared her throat and crushed the end of the cigar in her ashtray. Pip returned his cigarette to its pack as he rose from his chair. “Well I’ll keep that in mind.”

He left the Boss to her tea and passed the Angel of Death on his way out. The thought of downing a six pack alone in his own room tempted him, but unluckily for him the real work started with the sun’s descent.

Soon Mignonette would awaken. That amazing maiden, _mon coeur_. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Qui court deux lievres a la fois, n’en prend aucun- Who runs after two hares at the same time, catches none.  
> *Mon coeur - My heart.  
> (Sorry for any inaccuracies, I don't speak any French at all lol I'm just researching and copy pasting.) French is a beautiful language but it confuses me lol. 
> 
> I don't claim to be a good writer at all, I try to cut down on my wordiness and it's still wordy ugh. This chapter was so fucking hard. I reworked it a million times. Still not satisfied. But I'm hoping that adding my attempt at this pairing to the fic pool will help spark the inspiration for others to create more PxS stories, ones better than mine lol. I tried my best though. And also I'm VERY GRATEFUL for any feedback, kudos, etc. Thank you soo much. I apologize about being horrible with replying to comments but I have anxiety it makes me shy even on the internet. But I'll try and check out you guy's stories, especially AxI or PxS fics. Also I'd one day love to write AxI but I don't know if I can do it well(with them as the main focus). Integra and Alucard are some complex characters. I applaud all you who write them. 
> 
> Also I'm going to start writing the next chapter asap. If you're tired of reading about Pip btw, next chapter is a Seras one. Sorry for the wait on this one! Thanks for reading!


	6. Cognac and Apparitions

"God save our gracious Queen!"

"Long live our noble QUEEN!"

GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!"

A member of the Wild Geese belted out a patriotic tune without music. The man was bloody wasted and had decided to just go for it, apparently. The rest of the men, also plastered, encouraged this behavior with obnoxious laughter.

How Lukas knew the words Seras didn't know. But she wasn't even about to ask.

"SEND HER VICTORIOUS!"

"HAPPY AND GLORIOUS!"

"GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!"

Seras covered her smirk with one hand. Good thing they were at the far end of the manor, or Sir Integra might kill them herself. Beside her Captain Bernadotte scowled as he tilted dangerously far back in his chair, and Seras quickly slid an empty shot glass out of his way before his boot knocked it off the table.

"Keep it down," he barked. They either ignored him or didn't hear him and he muttered curses under his breath.

Seras watched him tilt his head back, exposing the stubble beneath his chin as he downed the rest of his ale. He slammed the empty bottle down on the table and immediately reached for the liquor.

Seras frowned. The Geese carried on sometimes after practice and it was no secret that the Captain drank, but this was almost a bender, an intensity she had not yet seen. She regarded him with a hint of concern.

Hoping she wouldn't have to yell over the surrounding commotion, she stalled his movement with a hand on his shoulder. "Hey mate, you all right?"

He swung his boots off the table and sat back in his chair like a civilized person finally. He glanced at her with a hazy expression as he poured more dark liquid into his glass. "'Am I all right?'" He smiled. "What a silly question, chère."

"Well you're um...drinking awfully fast Captain."

"Hm. Maybe so." He took a large gulp and Seras wrinkled her nose as she caught the wave of sharp alcoholic scent. Her stomach found it as appealing as gasoline.

Seras frowned at him. "Well maybe it's making me worry about you, idiot."

Her words made him pause and Seras felt a tinge of embarrassment when she realized her own statement. Pip broke into a sloppy grin and tossed one arm around her shoulders. "Aw, no need to worry your pretty head over it."

Seras found herself pressed into the solid weight of his torso as he tugged her into a sideways hug, wild strands of his hair tickling her nose.

Heat immediately rushed into her cheeks. She hated to admit it but Pip Bernadotte's attentions and affections weren't exactly...unwanted, but him hanging all over her in a room full of other people still embarrassed her to no end. Thankfully it was only the mercenaries and nobody seemed to be paying them any attention.

She found herself wondering, ' _Why did I agree to spend time with them, again_?'

But she liked the Wild Geese (mostly). Spending time with them after practice vaguely reminded her of the long gone evenings spent with other Cheddar officers after a shift.

A wobbly Lukas tried to sit down but missed the chair entirely and almost kicked a coffee table over in the process. The rest of the men brayed with laughter. Of course, the slain men she had known had acted nothing like the mercenaries. She could only imagine what kind of unholy hell the Geese raised when in a less austere environment.

With an flustered smile she slowly disentangled herself from her Captain. He let her go without complaint, his attention momentarily distracted by the men's antics. She noticed his accent thickened when he drank. "These idiots. Ay! Watch the furniture! I swear I'm not paying to replace this bourgeoisie shit!"

She had almost forgotten about quiet David to her left. "I wouldn't bother Cap," he said. "I doubt they let us around furnishings worth anything."

Pip leaned back in his chair again, scowling. "Eh. You're probably right."

"I'd just make sure they don't attract the boss's attention," the older man mumbled.

Seras inwardly agreed.

Pip finished off his drink, setting the glass aside with the rest of the clutter before struggling onto his feet. Seras watched his wobbly movements for half a moment until she finally grabbed his forearm with mild alarm. "Captain! I don't think- what do you need? You should sit down."

"Ma chére." He leaned away from her and steadied himself against the table. "I was just getting another beer."

"I don't think that's a good idea."

He attempted to straighten his precarious balance but stumbled and ended up clutching the edge of the table. "But chérie. My dear Seras. I'm not that drunk."

She scoffed. "If you really think you're not drunk Captain, you're bonkers."

He chuckled. "But this is nothing, mignonette."

Seras sighed, ignoring the way her heart fluttered when he spoke that pretty, silly nickname. "I'll get you one alright? Since you're so stubborn. Please just sit down."

He shot her an adoring look. "Why mignonette," he slurred, "so generous of you, but I-"

Her patience was wearing thin. "I don't mind! I don't think you'll make it halfway to the fridge and I don't want to watch you fall on your face. Please sit down."

The men around them cackled. He laughed again but finally complied and plopped back down in his seat. "If the lady insists."

Seras rolled her eyes and walked to the cooler, weaving through the mob of mercenaries, hearing a few of them start to argue amongst themselves on the opposite side of the room. She wasn't exactly surprised when the volume of their voices prompted another ironically loud warning from their Captain.

He seemed only slightly less bristled by the time she returned with the beer. The noise of the room had lessened, for now. She handed the bottle to him somewhat meekly but he took it from her with a soft smile. "Merci."

She nodded, mirroring his smile, and reclaimed her seat between him and David. The older man had turned away from them and was busy talking to another bloke with a wide scar across his face.

Seras shifted in her chair towards her Captain, lingering in his space despite the persistent sense of awkwardness at doing so. She wished she possessed even a smidgen of his ease of conversation. She picked at the edge of her skirt like a nervous teenager.

The Captain thankfully failed to notice her inner turmoil, the alcohol seeming to lure him into an introspective mood. He slumped forward against the table and propped his head up with an elbow. "You know what I've been thinking chère?"

"I probably don't want to know," she teased.

He chuckled, a pleasant sound that matched the sincerity in his smile. "Most of the time, you probably don't. But all jokes aside-" He leaned forward and lowered his voice. "I've been thinking you're entirely too good for this hellhole we live in. I mean the vampire shit, the violence, the darkness. You don't belong with killers, yet you still care about us. You've got a good heart Seras. You're perfect."

At first his words bothered her, seized her with worry for him, but his last statement caused her face to flush scarlet. "Captain..."

One of the Geese yelled from across the room, and she could tell the Captian's battered patience had finally crumbled.

He slammed a fist on the table. "Assholes I swear to God if you piss off our boss and she sends her big fucking monster down here to shut you up you're on your own!"

The potent stench of fear rippled through the room. Honestly, Seras knew Alucard wouldn't go against Integra's orders and harm the men, but even after all these months some of the Geese still panicked at the mention of Alucard.

"That vampire won't really come down here and bother us will he?" Craig's voice carried a hint of hysteria. "He can't can he?!"

"Why don't you keep shouting like that and find out."

Seras shot him a dry look and nudged him with her elbow. "Really? You're gonna make it worse."

Craig sat hunched over on the floor. "Vampires shouldn't be allowed to exist," he wailed. "God!"

Beside her Pip's body went rigid. She didn't even have to look at his face to realize his irritated mood had quickly darkened into anger.

David sighed. "Craig can't handle his liquor," he mumbled to her, though he glanced warily at Pip. She got the sense he was talking to the both of them. "Don't pay him any mind."

Another man laughed. "I'd shut up if I were you Craig!"

Craig didn't want to shut up, apparently. "How're we gonna fight bloodsucking, immortal freaks!?"

The scarred mercenary next to David chimed in. "Man, calm down. Nobody wants to hear that shit."

Another voice. "Don't be such a pussy. Besides we have the Police girl on our side! We'll be fine!"

Seras blushed as several pairs of eyes swung towards her corner of the room. Craig looked wild when he finally noticed her presence. "But she comes from Alucard! Right?! Alucard the monster?! She's a corpse just like Alucard!"

Pip sideswiped the empty bottles next to him off the table in a single furious motion and Seras nearly jumped out of her skin. Glass shattered all over the floor.

He bolted up to his feet with David immediately at his front, pushing him back. Pip ignored him, a murderous expression directed at Craig. "Don't you ever say that again!"

Craig grimaced, as if Pip had just slapped him. "Alright Captain damn! Sorry!"

"Apologize to Seras, not me idiot!"

"Sorry Seras!"

David looked tired as he tried to press the angry Frenchman back into his seat. "Cap, just let it go."

It took Seras a moment to do more than just gawk at all of them. She finally held up her palms and flashed a strained, embarrassed smile. ' _Walter really shouldn't've given them the Cognac_.' "Erm, it's alright. And Master can't actually hurt any of you, it's against his orders."

Craig had taken refuge behind a taller mercenary. "I don't even like to be in the same room as him."

Seras shrugged. "I don't think anyone does."

Some of the other Geese cackled amongst themselves at the whole exchange. "You should've known to leave the Police Girl out of it."

Seras didn't consider herself particularly sensitive, but she'd be lying if she said Craig's drunk rambling hadn't stung her feelings, only because the frightened man wasn't wrong. Alucard was indeed her maker and she was a member of the undead. An endless life of damnation awaited her on the black horizon, for eternity.

But she hadn't expected her Captain to come unglued over Craig's drunk ranting. Pip Bernadotte as she knew him always functioned with a level headed clarity. Or at least she'd thought so.

Without another word Pip pushed past David and sauntered towards the door, shouldering his way through the room. The other mercenaries carried on unperturbed by his outburst and nobody bothered to follow after him as he slammed the door shut.

Worry churned in her stomach.

David sat back in his seat. He sighed, shaking his head, concern lingering over his weathered features. "He's in one of his bad spells I bet."

Seras turned to him. "Bad spells?"

"Yeah. You can tell by the drinking. Though we all do it."

Seras frowned, her sense of disquiet deepening. "I think I'll go check on him."

David's eyebrows furrowed above his glasses. "You sure?"

Seras rose from her seat, already unsettled by the thought of her Master stumbling upon the lone drunk Captain in some murky hallway. Not that the vampire would hurt him, she reminded herself, but still...

David regarded her with a slight tilt of his head. "Don't feel obligated to chase after him. He's a grown man and we've partied in more dangerous places than this. Trust me."

She smiled, appreciating the older man's concern. David was more mellow than the other mercenaries, and with his mustache and glasses he almost looked like someone's regular dad. A faint feeling of bitter nostalgia pinched her heart.

"Well if he acts like an arsehole I'll put him in his place," she said.

He chuckled and patted her on the shoulder. "That's right, don't take shit from any of these fools, sweetheart. I'll let you handle it. The Captain's an alright guy. He likes you but he knows how to keep his hands to himself."

Seras almost choked on thin air, face flushed.

David chuckled but dropped the subject. "I guess I'll clean up this mess. Tell the Captain he owes me."

"Y-you got it. Thanks. Have a good evening."

After she bid the other mercenaries goodnight, Seras had to step over a passed out Lukas on her way out the door.

**xxx**

Pip Bernadotte had managed to cross the distance of two corridors before she caught up with him.

She heard him mumbling curses to himself before she spotted him at the end of the hallway, slowly but surely headed towards the direction of his quarters. The sight of a body lumbering around in the dark with haggard, uneven footfalls made her deeply uncomfortable at first. But she reminded herself that this was no ghoul, only the drunk and harmless Captain.

After she caught up with him she placed what she thought was a comforting hand on his back, but he recoiled in surprise and spun around. He relaxed when he saw her and braced an arm against the wall in a cumbersome attempt at balance. "Jesus fuck! Seras!"

She smiled guiltily, holding up her hands. "Whoops. Sorry."

He clutched the side of his head as if dizzy. "It's alright. You just caught me off guard. You sure do have a habit of treading lightly."

"I don't even realize I do it."

He groaned. "I think I drank too much."

She gave him a dry look. "I tried to warn you."

"You did." He sighed. "Damn. And they keep this floor so dark. Can't see a fucking thing."

She had an idea. Sliding her arm around his back and under his coat, she clutched his middle, fingers gripping the light material of his undershirt. She felt a surge of embarrassment and diverted her gaze. "How's this?"

He leaned into her side without any jokes or lewd comments, which surprised her. The heat from his body ignited a blaze of warmth through her side, past her uniform, heating her chilled skin underneath. The sharp odor of his cigarettes irritated her nose, but the smokey scent didn't remind her of tobacco so much as it stirred up feelings over Pip Bernadotte himself. It gave her body a weird lurching ache and she found herself leaning into him even more. "I don't want you to fall down the stairs," she added, sounding forcibly casual.

A soft smile graced his lips. "Thanks chère. What would I do without you."

She laughed. "I don't know, you drunk wanker."

He grinned at that but then grew quiet. After a long moment he finally spoke again. "I'm sorry about Craig's bullshit."

"It's alright. I didn't take it personally. I mean...I figured he was just being drunk and stupid."

"He still should've kept his mouth shut. Fucking asshole."

"Well I warned you not to scare them. They're terrified of Master."

"I'm scared of him too but you don't see me crying about it."

He stumbled and she steadied him with her free hand on the side of his chest. "Really Capitan, you don't have to stand up for me like that. I appreciate it but I learned a long time ago I have to, um, do it for myself. I don't want to cause problems between you and the Geese either."

"You don't cause problems. They cause problems by whining about vampires in front of you. I should have shoved my fist though his nose..dumb bastard."

Seras chuckled. "I'm surprised you didn't. I've never seen you that irate over anything. I've never seen anyone so defensive over my feelings. I'm um, glad you didn't hit Craig though. He'd probably wake up tomorrow not remembering why he had a broke nose to start with."

His expression turned pensive, as if he hadn't heard her attempt at lighter conversation. "You should've had someone care about you long before I came around mignonette."

She blushed, his words catching her off guard. "Well, people have cared before but they always leave," she answered bluntly, wincing when she realized what she'd said. "I mean, something bad always happens to them. Maybe I'm bad luck."

"I doubt you're bad luck chère."

"Well I'm a vampire now so there's that too."

"..Regardless, you're not a bad anything in my opinion. You might have bad luck but you're not the bringer of it. I'll take my chances anyway."

A mirthful grin creeped across her face. "You're not one to shy away from danger apparently."

He laughed, his smile almost boyish and it turned her insides to mush. "I'll admit, life without risk is terribly boring. Life without you would also be boring. I was less of a man before I met you. I didn't know what I was missing."

Her blush deepened and she stared at him for longer than she meant to and faltered in her steps. She diverted her gaze. "You're silly Captain." She stifled a flustered giggle with limited success. She didn't know how she managed to get roped into flirty dalliances with him time and time again, nor did she expect herself to ever get used to his shameless cajoling.

He laughed again. "Not a word I'd use to describe myself, but if you say so. But in all seriousness Seras, you deserve the companionship of someone so much better than me. You got the short end of the stick on that one."

She frowned, unconsciously tightening her grip on his waist. "You're always saying that, but I don't think that's true. You're not a bad person like you think you are Captain. I don't care about the..mercenary stuff."

He smiled, radiating warmth and she was again stunned by this youthful, almost humble expression on the handsome face of her battle scarred Captain. He shook his head, still smiling, as if he couldn't believe her words. "Like I said chérie, I don't know how I ever lived without you."

She paused, barely realizing she had caused them to stop walking. Her blush deepened but she didn't look away, forcing herself to hold his gaze this time and feeling a pleasant shock of elation for her effort. She had forgotten about her hand on his chest, but now she didn't want to move it at all. She slowly splayed her fingers across his steady heartbeat. "W-well I feel the same about you, you know.."

Her stomach did a weird teetering dance of excitement and nervousness. A part of her wanted to scream at herself, _'what are you DOING!'_ but she ignored it. She choose the truth over her own fear, even though it froze her insides with anxiety. She always talked with her Captain about all kinds of things, long into the night and he made her laugh which took the sting out of this desolate life and little by little she became less lonely. _'I don't know how I ever lived without you.'_

Her statement killed all pretense of jest and the sudden seriousness in his face halted her breath, which her lungs didn't need to begin with. He grasped the delicate hand on his chest and met her gaze, voice low. "I adore you Seras."

She was surprised by the raw tenderness in his expression and she studied his face, matching the vulnerability. "Captain.."

Suddenly acutely aware of the physical contact between their bodies, her own grasp on his side shifted from helpful to something with purpose and entirely less innocent, as she trailed her fingers up and down the bare skin beneath his undershirt.

He shifted their position, leaning his back against the wall and facing her as one arm left her shoulder and grasped the small of her back. His other arm wrapped around her waist and she let herself fold into his embrace, feeling his heartbeat speed up into a gallop beneath her gloved palm. A sense of safety descended over her like a soft shroud and all tension fled from her body.

She wanted to stand forever with him in quiet shadow like this, until his touch seeped her chilled skin with permanent heat. She loved this feeling. And it scared her. She felt way in over her head, but she almost wanted to drown in it.

The alcohol on his breath vaguely reminded her of why they were stuck together in the dim hallway to start with. "I think maybe you're drunk," she mused, smiling. "The sweet nothings are never-ending tonight." She cupped the side of his face in one hand, fingers barely reaching the edge of his leather eyepatch. Trailing her thumb along the plane of his jaw, she realized she detested whomever had ruined one of his brilliant green eyes.

She caught a glimpse of his bright smile before he leaned forward and whispered into her ear, the side of his face pressed into her hair. "I hope you know I'm only being honest. I wouldn't lie to you. And honestly I'd love for you to stay tonight, if you so desire of course. I sleep better with you."

A quiet breathy giggle broke past her lips. "For once, no lewd offers? Why Captain, I'm almost disappointed."

Her own words registered and heat flared across her cheeks. She couldn't see his face with him nuzzled into her hair like this but she could practically feel his roguish grin. He laughed low and soft. "You tease me, chérie." His breath combined with the sound of his dangerously enticing voice sent a delicious tingle down her spine and she leaned further into him without realizing it, pressing both their weights into the wall. He held her tighter and brushed his lips across the delicate skin above her cheek, next to her ear. "But if you ever really want to lie down together in the carnal sense, by all means let me know. We can do anything you want."

Seras shut her eyes against the shiver that raked down her body. She couldn't stop it, and she knew he'd felt it.

He gripped her tighter and pressed his lips to the bare column of flesh below her jaw, atop the delicate veins and muscle, kissing her there, and she didn't stop him. She didn't want to.

"Is that what you wanted to hear, Seras? I can't allow myself to disappoint you."

She only managed a weak response, a slow unsteady exhale of breath. His kisses trailed lower and lower, until each touch morphed into a longer kiss and Seras melted into his arms, tilting her head back, eyes closed, as he lightly, slowly caressed the supple expanse of skin with surprisingly soft lips.

Her free hand threaded through the thick layer of hair at the nape of his neck, gripping the tresses like a man overboard gripped rope. His slick mouth caused a fierce throbbing to coil between her legs like nothing she'd ever felt and all coherent thought danced out of her grasp. She heard her own uneven breath like an echo in the distance while a metallic odor, a sweet and sickly copper smell, taunted her with a violent surge of craving. 'I wish I could touch him without smelling blood.'

Self disgust hollowed her desire for a brief moment until she felt the pinch of teeth as he nipped and sucked on the side of her bare throat. Flames of pleasure licked at her body, burning away the bloodlust in a single heartbeat of blissful humanity as she bowed into him, hearing his breath hitch as he clutched her tighter to his chest, his hand dangerously low on her backside.

Seras felt like the one who had drank too much, intoxicated under this haze of sensation. An inkling from far away warned her that she might need to slow this down; _probably_ needed to slow this down. But God, his tongue... She rolled her hips forward into his and he pressed right back into her without hesitation. They groaned in unison, hers a short moan against her will, his deep and ragged.

Somewhere at the back of her mind she registered the sound of footsteps approaching. She squeaked in surprise and jerked back on reflex but remained half wrapped in his arms, the hand on her ass still clutching her against him. His mouth left her skin with a soft smack and he gave her a hazy, confused look. "Wait," she whispered, pressing a finger to his lips. "Someone's coming-"

Pip stiffened as he finally heard it. The footfalls lightly echoed in the hallway, drawing closer by each second. Cursing under his breath, he dropped his hold on her completely and let her step away from him into a proper, respectable distance. She self consciously straightened the collar of her uniform, feeling flustered beyond belief.

She expected to see one of the Geese, maybe Walter (though the old butler was usually in bed by this ungodly hour), but the familiar sight of shadows undulating along the walls revealed nothing. She shifted her weight from side to side, simultaneously annoyed by the interruption yet embarrassed by the dampness in her knickers.

Emptiness loomed across the bleak corridors. Darkness kept no secrets from her, not from her nocturnal vision, and yet the footsteps marched on, growing louder, detached from plausible origin.

Cold chills rose the hair on the back of her neck and she shivered, rubbing her bare forearms. Pip had gotten distracted by digging in his coat pocket for a cigarette but finally stopped mid motion, expression wary as he stared down the hall, listening with rigid stillness.

Two misty figures of men in uniform materialized at the end of the corridor. A jolt of reflexive fear shocked her body and she heard Pip's sharp intake of breath.

Their humanly presence carried no scent. Their iridescent bodies failed to block the sight of the surrounding furnishings. She saw a door through one man's torso.

The figures didn't acknowledge or even glance towards the direction of the two startled Hellsing members, instead staring mildly forward at nothing, mute and expressionless, as they crossed the expanse of previously empty hallway. They almost looked to her like a badly made hologram.

Seras gasped out loud when they vanished into the opposite wall. The echo of footsteps immediately dissolved into nothing along with the mysterious figures.

Seras couldn't bring herself to move for a long moment. She strained her senses for any lingering hint of the blurred strangers but only picked up on the subtle cadence of her Captain's rapid heartbeat. Stillness reclaimed its power over the corridors and vacant rooms within the apathetic mansion. It's secrets crawled back into the shadows, festering undetected within every lonely corner.

Pip scoffed and slumped against the wall, lighting one of his beloved Lucky Strikes. "Well, that was pleasant. Ghosts. What the hell? Why am I not surprised?"

Seras gulped and took a sideways step towards him. "Speak for yourself."

"You saw that too right?"

Cold chills slithered down her back. She tried to shake off the unpleasant feeling. "Yes. Unfortunately."

"I thought it was one of the Geese at first. They were wearing uniforms."

Seras realized the truth to his statement and covered her mouth in horror as a sense of dread descended upon her. They had been wearing uniforms. She had seen Hellsing's distinct red and black insignia attached to their ghostly shoulders.

"Don't tell me you're scared," he teased.

She drew closer to him and held a fistful of his coat. "Why? Aren't you?"

He shrugged. "What are ghosts in comparison to the existence of vampires and zombies, chère. Hell there's probably goddamn werewolves running around somewhere too."

She chewed her bottom lip. "I know, that's why I find it hard to believe the ghosts won't attack me."

He snaked one arm around her back and held her shoulders, gently pulling her sideways into him. "Why would they? I assume we just witnessed the spirits of two men killed by Millennium's previous attack. Poor bastards."

Her gaze dropped to the floor. She really didn't want to recall the sight of blood and other bodily fluids sprayed across the ceiling but the ghastly images persisted and flickered through her mind regardless.

Pip finally lit his cigarette and she saw the relief brought on by the nicotine hit pass over his face. "I just hope that wasn't supposed to be some kind of omen."

His words stung her and Seras gaped at him, her grip on his coat deathly tight. "You don't really think that's true?!"

"Even if it was, it doesn't matter. I've already signed the contract, and the boss's money's been rolling in for months." He shrugged.

Seras stared up at him with a look of uncertainty.

He held her closer. "Sorry, I probably should've kept that thought to myself. Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere."

She sighed as he leaned into her and rubbed her opposite shoulder with his free hand. She ignored the first sting of stubborn tears in her eyes. She didn't know why she had the sudden urge to cry to begin with. Too many highs and lows within one evening, maybe.

Fatigue seeped into her limbs. "I think I will stay with you in your room tonight Captain. If you don't mind."

The solitude of her basement dwelling and the empty coffin that awaited her sounded miserable. And if spirits waltzed into her room at any point in time she might actually scream.

"Of course I don't mind. As if I'd turn down the company of a beautiful woman, especially one that keeps the boogiemen away."

She smiled back at him and wiggled out of his reach. "You're such a lech. And a drunk."

"Well evidently ghosts are a buzzkill because I'm feeling pretty sober right now."

She smirked. "Oh are you? Good. Then you can walk by yourself."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will probably be more in sych with this one, but this chapter was getting entirely too long, lol. I've reworked this chapter a million times but finally decided to just post this version. I badly need to edit the previous chapters(nothing major just clean them up). Thanks so much for your feedback and kudos, etc!! I'm not the best with replies I'm really sorry about that but I promise I appreciate everyone who reads this silly story. Thank you! I will try my best not to take forever with the next chapter.


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